Relationship problems

[Mummytime12345]

Hi

My partner and I are not getting on, I feel he always makes points on top of points especially when it comes to the children, he is constantly trying to prove to me that I somehow don't care about them, it's awful I really hate it. When my daughter was born (11 months ago) he broke his arm 2 days before my csection, luckily he was able to get the op done on time, when I arrived back at home I had the worse pain ever, nerve pain, he didn't want to sit with me upstairs nor did he make me breakfast even though he was making everyone else, he literally left me to feel like I was weak and couldn't cope on my own, this created a lot of anger for me as I felt used so I made it very difficult for him to go and enjoy himself outside whilst I was at home in pain, he wanted to go and take my son out. Since then I have had stress after stress do to a long recovery (I stayed in for 4 months nearly during the week) I couldn't pick my son up so I was restricted to being indoors - and when we arranged childcare I went out but was literally in doors a lot anyway because of still needing to be with my son when he wasn't with childminder. I felt my partner wasn't very supportive during this period, I was going through so much stress with my son who was 2.5 years old at the time as he kicked and tantrumed a lot during nappy changes and he is non verbal (possibly ASD) we are going through assessments ATM, that was another stress, my partner made me feel like I was making up my son had ASD, he said when I talked about his negative behaviours that I was putting him down when in fact I was trying to highlight that I felt he had ASD and he was totally against it but seems to be in a bit of agreement now after all the stress and accusations.

Due to all the stress of the recovery I ended up suffering with Health Anxiety which again he doesn't try to understand, instead he says he's no psychiatrist and makes me feel like i can't talk to him. He looks after the kids in the evening after dinner around 7 to 8 to 8.30 and on weekends, I used to help more on the weekends but I feel unappreciated by him and he says things like I can't cope as a mum coz I'm struggling with my anxiety in the week with kids so I don't see why I should make his weekends easier when he talks to me this way. I really don't know what to do.