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Just split up with partner

(2 Posts)
Birnir27 Sun 16-Apr-17 02:53:19

I know I am doing the right thing but I love him and know I will miss him.
He is amazing in so many ways. But, his first marriage ended after he had an 18 month affair with a woman from his work.

I can't trust him, and after 16 months being together I feel like I am crushing from the worries that he might cheat on me too.

I am his third relationship since he left his wife five years ago. He said his x gf also had issues with his past.

I need handholding as I am in love with him and that is not going to just go away.

Please tell me you have been in a similar situation and that I am doing the right thing and thank you mumsnetters for reading.

AcrossthePond55 Sun 16-Apr-17 04:14:53

One of the most valuable (and hardest) lessons we learn in life is that sometimes love is just not enough. You can love someone to distraction and they can still be the worst thing in the world for you. It's a lesson that most of us learn the hard way! But we survive, learn, and move forward. And in most cases we find someone we can love who is the best thing in the world for us!

Have you completely cut contact with him? If not, do so. Block him on social media and your phone. And remember that you don't owe him anything and that you do not need to justify ending the relationship to him. A simple 'this isn't working for me anymore' is all you need to say. Don't bother to explain, he'll just twist your words.

Since you know he's bad for you, write down his worst qualities and the things he's done that have hurt you. Keep that list near you. Fold it up real small and keep it in a pocket, your purse, your bra. Somewhere, when you are feeling weak, that you can touch it as a physical reminder of how bad he really is.

Give yourself time. You won't get over this in a week. Keep busy.

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