H and I had been planning for business and personal reasons to move somewhere else within the EU at some point in next year. I discovered a quite long emotional affair in November from 11 years ago that he had gaslighted me on for years that rocked me somewhat and another rather disrespectful episode last year with texting another , although not what I would call an EA. I am still at home although mentally a bit distant and withdrawing on the codependency somewhat. However it seems I'm expected to carry on as normal and when he mentioned the moving the other day he said, you don't look that enthused , I said 'I'm not 100% sure as things are' and he said ' if that's how you feel what's the point of being married'. We do get on well generally , I just refuse to be rushed into things whilst I am still trying to mentally see how I feel going forward. Is it unreasonable of me to expect time and space to think things through , personally I feel I have to feel 100% if we leave , and I think that's fair on him too. I was hoping to give it maybe 8 months before making any decisions either way, it doesn't look as if I'm going to be able to have that time without having to start to commit to things one way or another. Has anyone else here been rushed to do things when they haven't immediately left Dp/H . No kids at home now, so that's not an issue
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