Currently going through the tail end of a divorce, during which my ex has restricted my access to my children, been extremely inflexible on child care arrangements when they are in place, and has dragged the finances out far longer than necessary and been very vindictive in that regard.
I used to get on with my ex's family really well, however since the split NC from them (to be expected I guess - I walked out). But my family are still in contact with my ex on FB, messaging etc. AIBU to expect that they shouldn't be, that they should understand the hell I'm being put through?
Been there, and yep it really hurts. Family just will not see how raw and deep your pain is not even that what he has done is hurtful.
The more you heal the less it will matter. And you need to aim for that place, the place, not where your friends and family 'see' your pain (they perhaps never will) but the place where you make peace with what has happened. That place is like a dot on the horizon right now but you can get there OP.
It takes time. Give yourself time. I found counselling hugely helpful.