Paranoia or something else??

[user1488819536]

I'm new to the forum so please be kind! About eight months ago I had a miscarriage at 12 weeks and although I was sort of ok with it at the time since then I haven't really been myself since and it seems to be making me paranoid about my marriage. About two weeks before my period is due I get the overwhelming feeling that I am going to lose everything ( animals, business, friends ) and in particular my husband! I totally convince myself that he is seeing some one else even though I have no reason to think it to be honest. Not long before the miscarriage he started a new job that meant staying away a few times which has made it worse. I have free access to his phones ( work and personal), he gave me the password for his ipad and work phone and doesn't really work late but if he does I start to go into mind overload! I have told him how I feel and he now tries to avoid staying away for work although some times it has to happen. He also said I can look at all his phones, texts, emails etc. We have a lot of fun together,he still wants to hold my hand when we go shopping, pats my bum when he walks past. We share the same hobbies and are still planning on trying for another baby which he is very keen to do. We also go out to dinner every week and are planning a holiday and decorating our house and looking to buy a second holiday home. All my friends say that he wouldn't be doing this if he was planning on going off but no matter how logical things sound i cant get the feeling to go. I even have nightmares about it.
He does take the phone into the bathroom with him but so do I just to catch up on the world. On the same note, he will leave the phone in the bedroom when he gets dressed in the morning.
When I feel like this I find myself questioning and suspecting everything he does.
The whole situation is eating me up. I'm not sure whether I am paranoid, if its hormones, PTSD or whether I should actually trust my gut and believe what I am feeling.

Has anyone else had anything similar following a miscarriage?
Until that happened I never felt like this, I'm sure.

Any advice greatfully received as I feel I am going mad.

[beingsunny]

It sounds like your hormones might be a bit off balance, can you ask for a full rack of blood tests to check if anything is lacking or over and maybe get this checked out?

I used to suffer terrible anxiety as part of my pmt and became quite irrational, have started on some supplements and am much more balanced.

It's pretty scary and at the same time you know it's not right

[Deathraystare]

People grieve in different ways. This may be part of the grieving process. You lost a child so you are maybe thinking you will lose him too? Anyway your hormones aren't helping. You need to get professional help.