I posted on here a while ago regarding mine and my Ex-partners relationship problems. In a nutshell, we were a couple in our early 20s, our sex life was non-existent after the birth of our son due to various excuses he would give (I'm not his type, he's tired, he doesn't like female bits). He would also watch porn on a near daily basis and not even attempt to initiate sex with me, nor respond if I would try with him. For 2 years I would spend hours researching ways to help our relationship, taking him to sex therapy, going on forums. I basically dedicated my life to trying to help him. In the end I chalked it up to him being asexual or something of the sort.
Anyway, we have been separated for about 3 months now. I am seeing someone new, I am happier than ever but have some trust and intimacy issues due to his behaviour. He came over today and we got chatting as friends, to which he told me he had been seeing someone new. I was pleased that he had moved on, until he told me that they had slept together the first night they met. Now I am not upset that he slept with someone else, nor that he has moved on. What upsets me is that he didn't have sex with me for 2 years, made so many excuses, and now this women he met on the first date he had sex with.
I know it shouldn't bother me, but it does. It hurts me that the one thing I wanted for 2 years he would make so many excuses for, and yet he jumped into bed at the first opportunity with someone else. I feel like I am so unattractive because my body isn't perfect anymore after childbirth.
I just feel so hurt and upset. I feel like I have wasted precious years of my life, wondering why he couldn't be honest with me, and how I am ever going to trust a man again. I know this sounds ridiculous and I shouldn't even care, I am happy our relationship is over, but this revelation has really hit me hard.
Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody
Relationships
Extremely hurt and angry at ExP. What now?
IsabellaTrout · 10/02/2017 13:34
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