My feed
Premium

Please
or
to access all these features

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Relationships

How long does it take to get over an abusive relationship/events in your life?

3 replies

snow123 · 07/01/2017 16:01

I was in a very abusive relationship six years ago which resulted in being stalked until last year. When I was 15 I was dragged off my bike and a man attempted a sexual assault, and when I was 20 a male taxi driver tried to abduct me and only stopped when we rounded a corner and police had cut off the road for another incident. (He forced me out of the car before it and I ran all the way home.) it's only recently I've realised how serious both of these were as I never reported it or even felt I could tell anyone until fairly recently due to counseling for ptsd from my abusive relationship.

All of these incidents have affected my life massively and although I'm having cbt and counseling now I'm wondering if they will ever go away? I'm married to a wonderful man and have a baby, but these events seem to affect my life in all aspects; from flashbacks to insomnia to panic attacks. I just wondered if I can ever expect these to fully stop or does an abusive relationship follow you for life? I feel like years on it's pathetic to still be processing these events!

OP posts:
Report
everythingis · 07/01/2017 16:06

A long time but it gets easier. I am still struggling 5 years in with lots of support. Things which remind me of exh behaviour can make me shake with anxiety still. FlowersFlowers

Report
Vagabond · 07/01/2017 16:16

It's a recovery period..... poor you... what rotten things have happened to you. Time heals but I think it's up to every individual to work out how they get through it. Read about the case of Jill Seward, who suffered a terrible ordeal and overcame it to the extent that she did. She sadly died yesterday and it's such a sad day for her family after what she endured. SHE, of all people, should be given a citizens medal for her work with rape survivors. Please Google her, she is a heroine.

Report
snow123 · 07/01/2017 20:02

Thank you. I know of Jill Saward I am a great admirer of hers and I am currently training to work with victims of similar crimes of mine and the laws surrounding rape and to try to raise awareness with young people around consent etc. I feel that it does help knowing if I can help one person who has been through anything similar to me it is worth it. I just feel that I will never ever fully accept what has happened to me and I am full
Of frustration- I feel like I'm living in the past but it is hard to look to the future! X

OP posts:
Report
Please create an account

To comment on this thread you need to create a Mumsnet account.