Hi this is my first question as trying to find solution to this massive problem on my own from last 5 years. We been married 15 years with 2 beautiful kids.i have try to explain my wife so many times in late night discussions in every possible way that we should make each other priority and look after each others needs. After that long talks we end up making lists of needs we need to work on however with in a week it's all gone out of her mind and she will be set in old ways as before. Also asked some close friends to discuss issues with no help at all. (WASTE OF THERE AND MY TIME).
I work full time to support family my working hours 7.30 to 7.00 and weekends free for family.she works 2 half days very near to home.
As men I have simple requirements like lot of married men I THINK I need love,respect and sex. My requirements met with no love from her she is sort tempered person likes to shout as much as possible for small things and as far as sex is concerned we made commitment so many times to have 5 times sex a week however we end up having once or twice a month the most.However it seems her needs is spending money on every possible way everyday spending time on phone with her parents brother and sister or finding some useless friends talking for hours on phone or cleaning house cooking and spending time with kids. End of the day full day of work when I need her companionship she don't have anything left for us she goes to bed around 8.00 I come from work At 7.00 sometimes she is around but she wants to watch movies of her choice if it's my choice she will be snoring next to me in 10 min.
It's a love marriage after 1 year of dating she asked me to get married for 3 months and I have said yes to her requests with one rule we should make each other priority in our life that's the biggest requirement I had.(actual fact I am steel the same need the same attention).
After 10 days in to marriage I realized my wife's priority is never gonna change now at 15 years it steel same. She is real close to parents brother and sister. She talks to them daily although we live 10000 kilometers away from them now. Biggest blow of my life to our relationship was she like to lie for them to cover there mistake and misdeeds always after 15 years it's the same nothing changed in that area. I have completely stopped talking to the my wifes whole family after number favors done to them without any appreciation from wife or there family.
I always believed husbund and wife should be one team against whole world however in our case I found she always like to take part from opposite end even in the matter of friends or family.
Our relationship is gone down so much I am thinking of taking a break or separation.only thread binding us is kids not sure for how long.
I have noticed she like to stay unhappy from last 5 years I hardly see her happy and positive. Whenever she is out with friends or her family she is happy as it can be the moment we go out togather as family she just be there as physical presence. rest of the time on the phone whats app and Facebook takes lot of time for her.
I like to find my own solution in last 5 years I read lot of books on subject of relationship marriage also listened to lots of books. I am not able to find solution as now I can clearly see the problem is her behavior in relationship. Also learnt that if i change matter might change i also tried that however i feel whenever i be as positive nice and work hard for her she takes advantage and nothing in return.
I think this the one thing in my life I feel I stuck forever as due to kids and 1000 other reason I am not able to move out and start fresh. As my age is 39 and she 35.
I really really need help so desperately as I am going mad living in house with daily fights no love or respect from her. I feel she is treating me.like ATM machine nothing more.
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Relationships
How do I solve relationship problems? As not able to get solution from last 5 years married from 15 years with 2 kids?
21 replies
user1478468007 · 06/11/2016 21:45
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