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I'm still not over it.

(6 Posts)
Milliewillnotbehome Mon 27-Jun-16 09:06:09

It's been 2 years since I found things out about my dh that have destroyed our marriage, I thought I'd get over it but honestly how long will it take? I'm sure he's cheated, he denies it. He had about 6/7 different ow messaging him on fb (just friends apparently but I've never heard of them) he was messaging an escort, it must of been for a while as I saw deleted snips. God knows if any of these other women were escorts too! He was also messaging a male escort. I'm mortified still by all this, I feel like my life is ruined!

FreeFromHarm Mon 27-Jun-16 09:16:34

I feel for you, my xdh was and still is all over dating websites, numerous affairs, when I found out about the last affair they all came out of the woodwork. He had been a sexually violent and domestic violence, I escaped nearly 3 years ago, he has women all single parents all over the country, his present ow has been staying in the marital home which is being sold due to divorce ( she has been one of 6-7) since I escaped with our dc, she has no idea what a narcissist he is, we are under Wa and protection. He drawers them in with gifts/ charming the children to gain the ow trust, worries me sick as he has infected me with stds. I know exactly how you feel, x is a business man, will sleep with any age . Your life will come together again, it does take time x

hellsbellsmelons Mon 27-Jun-16 15:30:12

So you aren't together anymore??
You have cut all contact - right???
It's the only thing that will go any way towards you recovering from this.
You may want to go to your GP and get a referral for counselling as well.

FreeFromHarm Mon 27-Jun-16 16:19:57

In final stages of divorce, he is not allowed near us , I have DV councelling and dc have been every comfort. I will feel much better ( good days and bad) when the house is sold and everything is finalised.
I am sending you my best wishes , if you need a hand hold, it will get better, you are allowed wobbles ok

SandyY2K Mon 27-Jun-16 21:30:03

Are you considering leaving?

Life's too short to be unhappy like this.

toadgirl Sat 06-Aug-16 11:43:14


Somehow, I missed this thread first time around.

Are you still with your husband? That's how it reads to me. If you are asking how you can stay with him knowing what you've discovered, I'm not sure you can. It will take more than just hoping it'll will happen though. Your husband would need to come clean 100%, be willing to work with you and you both go into counselling. Even then, you might not be able to get over it (and I'm not sure you should, TBH).

Let us know if we can help and maybe you could elaborate a bit more as I am not sure I have understood you fully.

Anyway, what you are going through is truly awful and soul-destroying, but there IS a way through. You're not alone.


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