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Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide, which can point you to expert advice and support.

i did it.

(7 Posts)
TheEntWife Fri 20-May-16 15:13:46

i told him i wanted a divorce.

He is so angry right now. Accusing me of ruining everything, of destroying him. I feel so guilty for hurting him this way but i just couldn't live like this any longer.

Our marriage has been empty for a long time. 3 kids and bucket loads of resentment. He always has to be right and in control. I was always in the wrong. i used to be able to brush that off but i cant any more.

Once i allowed myself to admit it, i felt so suffocated and controlled in our relationship and realized i was acting out in foolish ways to defy his authority but was really only making the conflict deeper.

We were setting an appalling example of marriage for our daughters.

Today I feel like i can breathe again. I just wish i could make it better for him. I dont want to deliberately hurt him but i cant let live like that any more.

He says i am not even trying to fix it but i feel like we have been trying for years and i have no faith that we can fix it. All we were doing was prolonging the agony.

lalalonglegs Fri 20-May-16 15:18:54

Good luck, TheEntWife. I hope it all goes well from here - you are over one very high psychological hurdle, focus on the practical as much you can.

Costacoffeeplease Fri 20-May-16 15:44:49

Keep the feeling of being able to breathe, and ignore his tantrum - he's still trying to control you

Twitterqueen Fri 20-May-16 17:11:15

Many of us have been where you are right now OP. Onwards and upwards! Best wishes as you move towards your new life - as one who knows, it will be worth it!

Lightheartedindeed Fri 20-May-16 17:23:02

I honestly could have written your post myself. Every bit of it. No advice but wish you luck flowers

HandyWoman Fri 20-May-16 18:11:52

Good luck, Entwife, you've done a strong and brilliant thing, both for your dc, and you. You will be fine, sad but fine. Enjoy the space.... flowers

ALaughAMinute Fri 20-May-16 18:43:59

Keep going and stay strong. There is light at the end of the tunnel. flowers

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