Advanced search

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide, which can point you to expert advice and support.

Am I being the idiot in this "relationship".

(13 Posts)
Notgivingin789 Sat 05-Mar-16 18:08:32

I have recently decided to give my relationship with DS dad another go, though I think I'm making a big mistake- again.

I haven't spent time with DS dad for the past weeks now, due to studying, both being very busy. So today DS dad asked me if I could spend time with him today. I declined, simply because I have been so tired this week. DS new school is far away, which is very exhausting. I've been studying and been going to sleep around 3-4am everyday as my work deadlines are becoming intense since we are nearing the end of the term. I just wanted to spend the weekend relaxing and not bother dressing up and going out. Also, the fact that no one can look after DS!

DS dad got into a strop and said that he has been missing me and wanted to go out today. I suggested that I can see him on Monday as there's no one to look after DS, but he said no as his very busy with his course. I then said that I can come today but I would like DS to come with us, He said no that I should get my sister to look after DS. I told him that I can't just do that! And besides that if he helped out more with DS! Like do the school run etc etc then maybe I wouldn't be so tired. He then said that this relationship is a joke and that he will find a new girlfriend, I was like shock and then he hanged up.

Am I being the douche bag in this?

TokenGinger Sat 05-Mar-16 18:10:41

At first, I thought you were being a douchebag but not seeing him. I was going to say, what's wrong with cuddling on the sofa, watching movies and snoozing.

But then he was an absolute nob and said not to bring DS etc. So no, you're not the douchebag, he is.

RudeElf Sat 05-Mar-16 18:11:10

No you definitely arent.

Your clue here was that he didn't want to see his son. That was when you should have hung up and given your head a good wobble for even considering going near him.

Incase that isnt clear DO NOT GO NEAR HIM! He is bad news for you.

Marchate Sat 05-Mar-16 18:12:41

Only if you continue the relationship xx

You are tired and busy. You don't need him making things worse. Life will get easier when you finish your course

Notgivingin789 Sat 05-Mar-16 18:13:51

I assumed he didn't DS with us as he just wanted it to be us two? We don't live together by the way.

TendonQueen Sat 05-Mar-16 18:13:54

No, he's the problem. He's being bratty expecting everyone else to fall in line with his wishes. Just not practical when you have a kid to look after, not that he seems to prioritise that. I wouldn't bother phoning him back. When he gets in touch say 'you're right, it's not working'. In fact channel what Angelina apparently said to Billy Bob Thornton: 'We have very different priorities. Mine is my son'.

Notgivingin789 Sat 05-Mar-16 18:17:37

He said he will see his son next week and that the other week he did so many things with him.

I just wished he helped out more with him. I just feel so exhausted with all what I'm doing.

FrogFairy Sat 05-Mar-16 18:19:11

Not wanting his son to come suggests to me that he wanted a shag.

RandomMess Sat 05-Mar-16 18:20:41

FGS he wants a girlfriend - he is not interested in the 3 of you being a family unit at all.

Ditch him for good.

RudeElf Sat 05-Mar-16 18:21:26

I assumed he didn't DS with us as he just wanted it to be us two?

Yes, and thats the problem

Notgivingin789 Sat 05-Mar-16 18:24:46

Frogfairy that's exactly it. Now to think of it. He said I should come over to his and then we could go out. We haven't had sex for the past weeks now.

BitterAndOnlySlightlyTwisted Sat 05-Mar-16 18:32:13

Yep, as soon as it's clear there's no shag on the horizon, he's getting a new girlfriend. You're not a family and never will be. You're just the booty-call.

Notgivingin789 Sat 05-Mar-16 18:34:52

Bitter harsh but true sad.

Join the discussion

Join the discussion

Registering is free, easy, and means you can join in the discussion, get discounts, win prizes and lots more.

Register now