I have never started my own thread before so sorry if I've done it wrong.
We met online last year and started dating I was completely smitten with him and he said he was with me, but he had a very busy life with coaching for his sons club and other sporting activities. He also had shared access with his son. I always moved things around to see him (I also work fulltime and studying for a masters as well as usual family commitments) but quite early on I realised that I was giving a lot more of my time and energy and when I asked to see him a little more often he backed off very quickly and said we wanted different things and he couldn't give me what I wanted.
I was heartbroken and it took me a long time to feel okay again, I was surprised at how much it hurt but I started going on dates and hoped I would eventually meet someone nice.
Then at New Year my ex got back in touch in touch with me, said he had never stopped thinking about me and couldn't believe he let me go. I was very uncertain for a start but he convinced me he had changed and now had time for a relationship. So we started dating again, but this time he came to see me a lot more (instead of me driving me to see him) and has done so many thoughtful things and seemed very different. He had booked 2 weekends away and said he was showing me we had a future together.
However last night he was at a coaches meeting and he texted me afterwards to say he has been asked to be head coach, this morning he never texted me back and in the end I asked him if everything was okay, he said no his head was all over the place and he didn't know where I would fit in if he took the this position because he couldn't see me getting involved in the sport? I asked if all the other wives and girlfriends all attend training and he said no they don't and I said I couldn't understand why he had to choose between me and the sport. He said he was having doubts about what we have in common and he needed space to sort his head out and he would phone me later, but it sounds as if he he has more or less made his decision.
I know I'm a twat for trying again with him in the first place, I just feel sad now. Please can someone give me a serious talking to. Sorry this is so long and boring I just needed to write it all down.
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Relationships
boyfriend having doubts
Paddington72 · 13/02/2016 19:12
"He said he was having doubts about what we have in common and he needed space to sort his head out and he would phone me later"
I'd feel like replying "Don't bother calling me. Fuck off you pathetic man". Dickhead 
Not sure if I'd send that though.
There's nothing undignified about pointing out he's done this twice now. That IS odd behaviour. Stupid man. Make you you have lots of chocolate and try to forget him. There are much nicer people out there! 
Oh Paddington - what a crap situation. He sounds like a total immature muppet - you are well rid.
Definitely delete his number from everywhere (contacts list, call lists etc) and delete any text messages/emails.
You don't need someone in your life who puts you through the emotional wringer like this.
There are great, loving men out there on OLD but your ex definitely isn't one of them and you've had a lucky escape before dedicating more of yourself and your time to him. Well done you for dumping him! 
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