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Impressing dh after a lengthy separation due to work

(23 Posts)
AlwaysStarving Fri 04-Dec-15 22:25:10

Ok so this is my first thread on mm so I apologise if I get things wrong. Anyway, dh has been working abroad for the past year and is back home next week. He came for a holiday in the summer and left in August so we haven't seen each other for pretty much 4 months. We have 2 little girls and a lot has changed i'm fat. I was wondering how other mm's have greeted their oh's if they have been away for a while. I feel like a flippin virgin and know he is horny as f***. So am i tbh but i'm scared he will think holy shit you got fat! So, apart from the sexual stuff, what other things have you guys done for your man to make up for lost time?

summerainbow Sat 05-Dec-15 04:31:28

Have some time just you him and get yourself reconeted.
Then have some time as famliy so you can all learn what is it like to have father around . This will be hardest. Or was for me and ex as I had to learn to consider another person and he had to learn how to parent older children. And kids have get used to having a dad around.
As for weight gain well he will have changed too .

GreenSand Sat 05-Dec-15 05:18:09

Don't worry about the weight.
Get the immediate impulse out of the way, and then spend time getting to know each other again, cuddles, kisses, holding hands.
Get the kids used to having Daddy back again, and learn to live as a family again. It will take adjustment on all sides.

AlwaysStarving Sun 06-Dec-15 00:05:31

well i am not looking forward to the dirty socks on the floor, the bathroom being damp and wet constantly, making endless cups of tea and oh lord his farts!

welshguy1 Sun 06-Dec-15 00:20:11

From the male perspective, believe me he won't care much about the weight. Just be pleased to see him and enjoy your time together. It doesn't need to be complicated - we aren't smile

orchard13 Sun 06-Dec-15 00:39:27

My DH works away a lot too, it's so tough, I find it harder when be comes home than when he leaves, especially for the kids. I'd say keep your routine the same for your girls but definitely book a babysitter in for a few dates so you and DH have time together. And make sure he has time with his own friends to go out, my DH says he hates feeling like a guest, so let him do his own thing without making him feel bad. And the best advice I can give (which I should give myself!!) is to chill out and don't put pressure on yourself xxx

dratsea Sun 06-Dec-15 00:50:29

Do a search on MN for, I think it was the "one hour rule", someone with a few more functioning neurones may came up with the link. My dad used to travel a lot, my mum had a 17inch waist until she had me, and three more dc at regulation 2.5 yr intervals. We used to look forward to dad coming home because mum used to find a packet of Spangles as a special treat, and thrown them onto the lawn and I swear most of them were green. By the time we came in "Dad was in bed having a sleep so no noise please" Got into teens before I worked it out and kept younger siblings well out of house for 3 mins until I saw her back downstairs. And until dd ready to leave home I could never believe my parents still dtd after the age of 40, still not sure how they got away with it but remember walking in on them one morning and DF topless "because just back from somewhere cold" and DM buttoning up <urgently> wearing his pyjama top.

DaemonPantalaemon Sun 06-Dec-15 14:30:04

Just how fat did you get in 4 months? And did he not see you at all on Skype etc in those four months? Does he work for MI5 or something?

AlwaysStarving Sun 06-Dec-15 15:09:31

Last I checked a stone, that is from eating at ridiculous hours as I am still trying to finish my dissertation for uni and also just eating for the sake of it. We have skyped but the connection is dodgy so the pic hasn't been good for a while. I just found myself smiling and my cheek actually got caught under my eye if that makes any sense hahaha! And nope DaemonPantalaemon he is a mere teacher in the Middle East no secrets here i'm afraid.

LionHeartedWoman Sun 06-Dec-15 15:09:34

dratsea, lovely post.

AlwaysStarving Sun 06-Dec-15 15:13:37

Orchard13 I completely understand. I find it is easier when he isn't here as I am then pleasing myself and not having to think of another adult. He has also mentioned in the past he feels like a strange so shall see how that works out. Also we have an 8month old DD who will definitely not recognise him this time around and I know he is going to be very upset but that's life. sad

BrendaandEddie Sun 06-Dec-15 15:14:46

Wtf are you on about with the spangles

slightlyinsane Sun 06-Dec-15 15:19:46

Spangles are sweets.

Lweji Sun 06-Dec-15 15:21:54

Never been away from an OH that long, but if he needs to be impressed, then LTB.
He should be glad to be back with you no matter what.

Lweji Sun 06-Dec-15 15:23:29

Or rather, if he is not impressed by you just as you are, then he's not worth you.

AlwaysStarving Sun 06-Dec-15 15:36:26

Lweji I have told him and he said he really couldn't give a monkeys but it's just me being i guess. Infact he has been going on about having another baby when he gets back shock..errr no thanks not right now

BrendaandEddie Sun 06-Dec-15 15:49:37

I know that they're sweets. Why on the lawn?

slightlyinsane Sun 06-Dec-15 15:57:07

A lengthy game of hunt the sweets, just enough time for mum and dad to get jiggy and not get caught

BrendaandEddie Sun 06-Dec-15 16:00:32

Christ. Have they no restraint?

Horsemad Sun 06-Dec-15 16:37:17


calzone Sun 06-Dec-15 16:57:50

Delightful as always Brenda......

((Wishes there was a Hide Poster button))

BrendaandEddie Sun 06-Dec-15 16:58:47


BooAvenue Sun 06-Dec-15 17:29:06

My DH is army so often away for a few months. I always arrange for the DC to go to see grandma for a day the weekend after he arrives home and we spend all day in bed together "reconnecting". No special underwear or anything required, just the two of us and its bliss!

Then the Sunday we will pick up DC and have family time together.

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