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Is this sexual assault?

(13 Posts)
purpleone1973 Wed 18-Nov-15 03:27:58

Out for a drink with 7 men last Sat. Partner, brother and some of their mates
No women or wives came, just me. Feel like I'm intruding on a lads night out?
One brushed past and sat on my lap and mentioned about my warm thighs, so I got up... Then another gave me a groin rub from behind.
My partner saw all this, I complained. Said its banter. He did nothing. Said nothing
I feel horrible

franklyidontgiveadamscarlet Wed 18-Nov-15 03:37:42

Eww who does that to a woman.

Yes it is.

What sort of man lets his mates touch his girlfriend.
Its not on.

bodenbiscuit Wed 18-Nov-15 03:59:21

They all sound vile - poor you sad

purpleone1973 Wed 18-Nov-15 04:06:34

The last time I saw them in march, I caught one looking down my top. Same one who sat on my lap.
My partners brother was the one who groin rubbed me. Talked derogatory about women. Shagging brass. One text the other and I read 'going to shag * bird, back in 5'
Talked openly about fingerings and anal. Is this what men do these days?
I have a very open mind, give as good as I get, but even I was embarrassed

groovergirl Wed 18-Nov-15 04:29:51

Charming. Do you need to see these skanks ever again? (And no, being a good sport and keeping the peace with your partner's mates is not a proper reason.)

TBH, I am more concerned about your DP's cowardly lack of response. Has he explained why he did not stick up for you?

No wonder you're feeling horrible. I wonder how these guys would feel if a woman stuck her fingers down her throat and spewed on them or pulled her tampon out and flicked it at them. Righteously pissed off, I dare say.

Skiptonlass Wed 18-Nov-15 04:30:14

Yuck. Banter.

Banter basically means 'I have done something incredibly twattish but if you call me out on it I will call you a prude.'

I'm so sort this happened to you. I think you need to have a serious talk with your dh about why this isn't acceptable.

ThisIsStillFolkGirl Wed 18-Nov-15 06:49:20

How long have you been with him? I'd be reconsidering, if I were you, on the basis that you can judge a man by the company he keeps.

Penfold007 Wed 18-Nov-15 06:55:33

Your 'D'P probably behaves in much the same way when you are not around. He shows you little respect.

molyholy Wed 18-Nov-15 06:57:58

Oh my god!!! Your partners brother rubbed himself on you sexually and your partner said it was banter!!! Yes they were all vile and you were assaulted, and I would be seriously reconsidering my future with this arsehole. Yuck.

hesterton Wed 18-Nov-15 06:58:35

Do you think they were trying to show you that your presence wasn't wanted at their elite and classy gathering? I would ditch the bf, he sounds gruesome.

Sighing Wed 18-Nov-15 06:59:42

His brother grabbed and pawed at your groin from behind angry jesus I'd be kicking off big time over that. Sod whether he stood up for you. "banter" my arse. You say partner. Not worth marrying that one really, is it. What would the rest of his family be like, they learned the behaviour somewhere. Imagine a lifetime of groping.

Sighing Wed 18-Nov-15 07:00:06

And yes. LTB

MythicalKings Wed 18-Nov-15 07:13:19

I wouldn't continue in a relationship with a sexist shit like that. Dump him and his horrible bantering friends.

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