'D'h and I have split over the holidays and family/close friends know. That's fine - I've just been honest about the reasons (very heavy drinking among others) & I'm very happy about the split. but when it comes to all the people I know through the dc and school, local area etc I don't want to go into details, one for the kids sake I don't want their dads misdemeanours filtering down to them & two because he'll still see them at events etc. I'm a bit worried about 'facing' all these people in September, actually just writing this is helping me sort this in my head. Several acquaintances have spilt in the past few years & it's been a huge talking point in the playground, much fuss made over the supposed wronged party & texts & emails flying about how to help/who's going to make her a pie etc one even made an announcement at Cubs ! I'm shy but on the other hand I don't want to be rude. I don't want sympathies because I'm frickin delighted he's gone but I can't say that can I?! If I said thanks but I'm fine, save your sympathies for the kids' does that sound rude?!
Like nearly everyone else, my exes and I generally ended up saying we just weren't compatible and/or had grown apart. Most people don't care that much, they're just asking in case you need to talk - and would be crap listeners, but hey.
"Save your sympathies for the kids" is great, imo!
Why do you need to say even that? Why not just say 'We've split up - things weren't working between us' and leave it there? People will likely talk anyway so I suspect that the less you say the better.