I'm having issues with my own SM at the moment. As she gets older she seems to be getting more and more bitter about decisions that she has made in her life. She also seems to be trying to dictate more about what we do so that it fits in with her ideas and is actually being very verbally aggressive about it.
Many years ago she made the decision to move to where my dad was because he made it clear he wouldn't move away from the area because he wanted to be near to me and my sister, plus all his family are here and i suspect he thought he'd been through one divorce and wasn't going to risk all the upheaval again and didn't want to be away from his support network. He gave her the choice and So she chose to move her child down to live in the area and set up home. Her child had problems settling in the area and has never really got on well in life, nothing major just listless and working in dead end jobs. She is now very bitter about her choice saying that this has disadvantaged her son and how he has done in life. She is determined to think that it was because of the move and nothing to do with the individual themselves. She is starting to talk very aggressively and resentfully about this decision to me but This is a decision made when I was a child so really wasn't any of my doing! My sister and I had a rough time when we were young, lots of family issues but through determination and hard work we've both established ourselves in successful careers and have our own children now (my step brother doesn't) this seems to be causing resentment on her part.
My sister now lives in a different part of the country and my step mum's son has moved away. My SM is now trying to dictate that we move close to them so that we can look after them as they get older. My dad is adamant that we should live our own lives and wants us to move where we are happy. He has said this many times over the years. Problem is SM was quite nasty about this issue berating me in front of my dad, suggesting that i have responsibilities and i am selfish. I am able to stand up for myself but I was so shocked and it are completely out of the blue I didn't really know what to say! My DH (who wasn't there) said my dad should have stepped in and stopped her but he didn't I think she is verbally bullying him more now and his approach is to pretend it isn't happening. She back tracked later on saying that's not what she meant but tbh I wasn't buying it considering how she clear she was at the time.
I used to think she was okay, a bit sharp at times but generally ok. I'm sure that there is something else going on, I've asked my dad but he doesn't know (he would tell me I'm sure). She just seems so bitter about things now.
I think deep down she is disappointed with my step brother and decisions he has made in life, but that isn't my fault!
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Relationships
Problems with Step Mother
11 replies
RaaRaaNoiseyLittleLion · 26/06/2015 06:41
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