Advanced search

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide, which can point you to expert advice and support.

Divorce revenge fantasies "see you in court"

(13 Posts)
Cabrinha Sat 20-Jun-15 10:55:54

I'm a level headed person who makes sensible decisions. But I do like a good revenge fantasy! It de-stresses me, then I move on...

I ditched XH over 2 years ago, for fucking prostitutes out whole relationship.

I came out with less than 50% of assets - I chose to exclude things like his business that I wasn't a part of. My choice, I'm happy, not pressured. I let him stay in the house and delay buying me out. V v favourable for him, though my reasons were practical - not a pushover!

So, we're divorced and CO done, but there is one thing outstanding: a small value pension transfer to me.

Today, the 4 month period to do it has expired, purely because of his lack of attention to doing it. The whole divorce was like this - possibly lazy more than nefarious, but stressful for me having to chase chase chase all the time.

The transfer will happen eventually, but late - so he's now in breach of the CO.

The money he owes me from the house? Subject to a legal charge. One trigger for payment earlier than 7 years time? If he fails to comply with CO.

The revenge fantasy: the look on his face if I popped round today and told him he has til next Friday to give me tend of thousands of pounds. And all because he was too lazy to reply to his pension company's request for a signature.


Aaaah, just wanted to get that out there!
Feel free to add your revenge fantasies smile

mrstweefromtweesville Sat 20-Jun-15 11:55:12

Not revenge and not a fantasy but I did have the opportunity to say 'see you in court'. During our marriage, my then-husband liked to hit me from time to time. After we split up, on an access visit, he raised his arm to hit me. I was able to say "Go on, hit me, and I'll see you in court!" His face. He knew he could never hit me again. Another fun moment was when he was expressing his 'disappointment' about something I was or wasn't doing. "What are you going to do," I said, "leave me?" I had already thrown him out.

Cabrinha Sat 20-Jun-15 13:09:20

Oh high five MrsTwee!
What an arsehole, how sweet to show no fear to his raised hand, the fucking bully. Well done you! grin

whattodoforthebest2 Sat 20-Jun-15 13:17:57

I'd like to have seen XH's face when he opened his pension statement six months or so after our divorce was finalised. He had had one big and one small pension. To save unnecessary expense, our solicitors agreed my half should come out of his large pot. Leaving two small pensions.

He never bothered to read the small print properly in documents.

Cabrinha Sat 20-Jun-15 13:41:20

Oh I love that!!!!
I have split all legal bills 50/50, despite the marriage failure being All His Fault. Cheating bastard.
But I had him sign to say he'd bear the pension transfer costs. No idea what they'll be. Depends entirely on the company. I'm hoping £££. He won't realise! Mwah ha ha!

whattodoforthebest2 Sat 20-Jun-15 13:44:55

OP - be v careful where you put your half of the pension - some of the big hitters charge a lot in annual/management fees and service charges etc.

I put mine in a SIPP and I manage it myself, having done lots of research beforehand. It's doing well so far.

goddessofsmallthings Sat 20-Jun-15 19:18:33

What is stopping you making your fantasy reality?

ifiwereuidhatemetoo Sat 20-Jun-15 20:01:16

While it's all good to have fantasies cab if you have children I wouldn't recommend what what has done! Any money her exH now hates her guts which is fine and dandy if no one else is around to be hurt. I do love a revenge fantasy though!

brokenhearted55a Sat 20-Jun-15 22:03:22

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Cabrinha Sat 20-Jun-15 22:09:25

Goddess I don't actually want to, simple as that! I like to laugh about it being a perfect revenge for all the stress of chasing paperwork for 2 years - that it would be so fitting for a delay in paperwork to really cause him a headache! But I have several good reasons - not least that there are 4 houses on the street on the market and it's a bad time to sell there so my valuation would be lower than I think it will be in a few years. And I do have a child so don't need the stress. And as broken days, or the lawyer's fees. Although - there's no arguments to be had, it's not a negotiation - he's broken terms and there are consequences, if I push them.

It just makes me feel happy to have a little chuckle about what I could do. I'll reach indifference soon enough, but it's a bit of a way to go still!

Fiddlerontheroof Sat 20-Jun-15 22:12:43

My fantasy, after he had a 5 year affair and dumped me with two kids...

Losing 6 stone, and walking into his place of work looking old place of double takes from everyone, while he remains very overweight and looking quite miserable....standing next to OW, who also looks overweight and miserable...

1 stone to go to make my fantasy a reality smile

Ah, karma is a wonderful thing....

Cabrinha Sat 20-Jun-15 22:38:43

Wow! That's a massive achievement!!!!! Fabulous even without the added realisation of fantasy - but so sweeeeeet to get that too!

goddessofsmallthings Sun 21-Jun-15 01:21:35

Fair enough, Cab... after all, it is a dish best eaten cold after interest, houses values etc have racked up grin.

Way to go Fiddler! Sashaying in fresh from the beauty parlour wreathed in smiles wearing a form fitting day dress and killer heels < yay! > emoticon and then a 'must dash - got a lunch/dinner date at Le Gav* with a gentleman who happens to be seriously well connected and tres wealthy' - this being said to whichever member of staff you know to be the office telegraph.

*substitute swanky/Michelin starred restaurant of your choice according to your location.

Join the discussion

Join the discussion

Registering is free, easy, and means you can join in the discussion, get discounts, win prizes and lots more.

Register now