My feed
Premium

Please
or
to access all these features

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Relationships

moving abroad/leaving a relationship

7 replies

iris5858 · 06/01/2015 22:14

I have a big decision to make that I feel unable to solve and I'm hoping there might be some advice out there. I've been offered a job in New York with my company, a Twp year posting. I recently got back together with my ex who I love very much but hasn't been the most reliable person. It's a good opportunity that everyone is telling me I must take. I don't want to stay for an unreliable boyfriend but at 38 I want to have a baby rather than move and spend two years working really hard. I'm worried I'll regret it if I don't go though. Any advice or similar experiences?

OP posts:
Report
ImperialBlether · 06/01/2015 22:17

In what way is he unreliable? The thing is, I would hate to have a child with an unreliable man.

I would never be able to turn down the chance to work in New York, so I'm not the person to ask. I'd have packed my bags by now!

Report
IsItTeaYoureLookingFor · 06/01/2015 22:35

Go to New York!!!

Who knows, you might meet someone there? Smile

Report
iris5858 · 06/01/2015 22:42

We've split up a few times before, always because of him. It's definitely different this time and we're talking of a future together but I have doubts still though I really would love it to work

OP posts:
Report
hiphoplollipop30 · 06/01/2015 22:44

I'm moving to New York in a couple of days, my relationship ended about two months ago now. It didn't end because I was going to New York.

I hear where you're coming from, as ImperialBlether says, in what way is he unreliable?

As much as I still love my ex, I know this next step is the right one for me, and you only live once.

Has it crossed your mind that you might meet someone reliable and amazing in New York to make babies with?

Report
Cabrinha · 06/01/2015 22:46

Why is it definitely different this time?

Can he come to NY?

Is a LDR a good test of your commitment to each other, useful before starting a family?

I'm always wary of on off relationships.
I say ditch him, enjoy NY, and date your heart out whilst you're there! (Brits only if you're wary of complication)

Report
LineRunner · 06/01/2015 22:59

Go to New York.

But don't have a baby with someone who won't let you leave.

Report
DonkeysDontRideBicycles · 06/01/2015 23:00

You are not quite sure of your ex are you, so why not seize this opportunity to work abroad. If he is serious he can fly over and visit. He's been the one to break up the previous times so this time you get to call the shots. And yes maybe meet eligible, more reliable men.

Report
Please create an account

To comment on this thread you need to create a Mumsnet account.