Ive been with ny dp for over 14 years. I am 33 weeks pregnant. 3 older dc, 2 have asd.
Dp isn't a bad person but he isn't really a partner. I do everything. I organise everything. I deal with all the dc stuff- medical appointments, which are vast for youngest dc. The 3 schools etc etc.
I ask very little of dp as he works very long hours & not for great money.
I ask him to do specific diy or job's. Never hoovering, washing or ironing. He doesn't even do the small things I ask of him anymore.
Im hardly ever ill but ive had 2 severe UTIs & now I think I've got flu as I feel so ill. Yesterday, I asked him to take dc out so I could sort the dc bedrooms. He got up but then went back to bed! I totally lost my temper & went to bed from lunch time til the evening...unheard of but I'd had enough.
He's just so lazy. He doesn't support me or make me feel cared for. No help during the pregnancy. Never takes me out- says it because I don't organise a babysitter. I never go out not even for my 40th. I can't talk to him as he just doesn't engage or respond during a conversation.
Why am I still with him? Fear that it will be worse on my own. No family or friends. No support at all. I would end up on benefits. There's no child care for dc with asd. If I lose the car I would be literally trapped in th house. I don't even have a birth partner, that in itself explains how isolated I am...
I don't even want the baby anymore. She's just another person to look after. I had a surprise pregnancy at the start of the yesr but had a MMC. I was devastated. I quickly became pregnant again but I think it was more about the mmc then wanting another dc.
My mil was a great help but she died 3 months ago.
My sister also was helpful but we fell out 6 months ago & now have NC.
Its all such a mess. Nothing is ready for Christmas. Ds gets holidays this Friday. Other 2 next Wednesday. We haven't even a tree! Dp is working up til Christmas Day.
Ive nothing for the baby. The house is hideous. Clothes & paperwork every where. I give up. I can't do it all anymore...
How do I csrry on?
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Leaving but no support....am I mad?
10 replies
Shellywelly1973 · 09/12/2013 12:08
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