In the context of all thats going on now (separating and family breaking up to live in separate countries), this is a fairly shallow post - but man, I'm finding the humiliation of my H's infidelity hard to deal with. I believed our love was strong and true and we always quietly congratulated ourselves on having a relationship which was way above average. It's not a contest, but to know that the one you're spending your life with thinks you're fabulous and that you have huge fun in normal everyday life - that's quite something.
Above our piano is a picture I had made for our wedding anniversary this year. It is beautiful - one black and white photo for every year of our marriage, something significant which happened during that year. Our three children feature in the years they were born. A symbol of how much I love him and our life together (in spite of problems which I though we were coping with - secure in the knowledge that he would always be loyal to me). Now it mocks me. When we move I will leave it behind.
Another example is that during the couple of weeks where I was probing for the truth, I asked one of my SILs to tell me anything she knew at all that cast doubts on my H's truthfulness to me. That was a devastating conversation. It was the first time I realised that there have been other things earlier in our lives together which I missed. Not nice to have someone tell you that she almost phoned on the morning of your wedding to tell you not to marry him (that was a bit dramatic on her part, not helpful 10 years later either). More fool me, for asking.
So, anyone else got stories of humiliation to share? In time, I hope to smile about my wounded pride.
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The humiliation
16 replies
DesertDilemma · 27/05/2013 01:40
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