toys from ex

[wonderingsoul]

i dont if i am or not.

the ex has randomly sent some presents for the boys. the first time in 4 years. no card or letter just a present.

the boys are happy and joyed. my problem is they are two machine nerf guns. it doesnt sit well with me, and i see them as inapropiate gifts. ess considering ex was militery and has it had messed him up mentally.

i think its because they look like machine guns.. they are 4 and 7. i have emailed their facebook saying they where recieved and they said thank you but i want to sell them and give them the money to choose something else. would i be being unreasonable to do so?

we live in a small 2 bedroom flat. having them run round with them shooting every thing is a nightmare. they aim it at me, and some may disagree but its really grates on me having something aimed at me, iv told them 100 times not to, taken it off them 100s of times buyt they soon forget this rule in theri excitment. its jsut casues headachs.

ill be uiuntreasted to see if imbu to sell and use the money for a different toy or if i should just hope they get bored of them, as of the moment its all they want to play with.

[wonderingsoul]

intreasted should i say? my fingers took on a life of their own then.

[CogitoErgoSometimes]

I would simply take the guns off them and put them away. If you can exchange them for something else, even better. No need to tell the ex anything at all.

[Chocotrekkie]

In terms of selling them doubt you will get more than a couple of pounds - maybe a fiver if your lucky.

Is the weather ok ?? Take the kids to the park with them, they'll loose most of the darts and then you can bin them/ put them away/sell them..

[wonderingsoul]

no i wouldnt tell the ex anything. they where sent from amazon but i could sell them on all be it for a lesser price but could quite easly get 45ish for them so they could buy some thing else that is deacent.

i just dont know if i have the right so to speack

[wonderingsoul]

yess. im taking th em to the park tomorrow so thats an idea. as i refuse to buy them that stuff anyway so they wouldnt ask more then once for me to buy the bullets.

[CogitoErgoSometimes]

Of course you have the right to. They are 'unwanted gifts'. Once they've been given and once you've said thanks, they're yours to do with as you wish. Do you think this ex is going to drop by and check up that they are playing with the guns or anything like that?

[wonderingsoul]

no he lives in america and hasnt spoke or seen them for 4 years so no chance of finding out.

its becasue theve seen them so i couldnt stop them playing from them and that THEY love them that i feel unfair taking them of them asnd selling them becasue i dont agree with them.

[CogitoErgoSometimes]

Unfair? My DS thinks it's 'unfair' that he can't have ice-cream for breakfast.... :) but that's our job as responsible parents isn't it? Until they're old enough to make good decisions for themselves, we have to decide what's best for them. Even if that makes us briefly unpopular because we've had to take away some annoying toy sent by an irresponsible parent....

[CrossWhy]

I think you are being unfair and hating the toys for being from your ex and your sons liking them. Most boys at their age will love guns but, most boys who play with guns will never join the army. Yes it is annoying having them run around in a small space shooting guns and aiming at people (we have a no shooting people rule as well and it does work eventually for most of the time). Let them slowly run out of ammo (even put one from each gun in the bin every week) but do not take them off them and sell them. You will become the bad guy in their eyes and they will still have fun with them when they loose all the ammo except you won't have to worry about being in any crossfire or them destroying any vases you have around the flat.

[BlueberryHill]

If they are the rapid fire ones the batteries will run out soon.

With any luck.

Hopefully they will lose interest then.

[Theenemy]

If you sell them and give them the cash to buy something else they'll probably choose toy guns. Take them down to your local park where they can run around at their hearts content shooting things.

[wonderingsoul]

cross fire. you are very wrong. i do not hate them because their from the ex, and its insulting to suggest that. i have done everything i can to get him to have a relationship with them. i dislike them becasue they look like machine guns. had he got them anything else. id be fine about it.

my two arnt really gunny children, and have never really asked for them.

i have put them up o n a fb selling page, but if i dont get any good offers they will keep them and we'll go to the park.

[MiconiumHappens]

Is anyone on FB friends with your ex? As this could cause a shitstorm, and put him off sending anything again. Up to you.

[wonderingsoul]

no, none of my facebook friends are firends with him and my settings are very tight. there is no way of him finding out, not even through the kids as he refuses to phone them becasue he thinks its their job to keep incontact with him.

[spottyparrot]

My ds was given a nerf gun. I told him he was only allowed to shoot the sofa (when nobody was on it). He isn't allowed to fire at anything else. He can put toys as targets on the sofa but no shooting at people ever and only shooting in this one room. Could you try this?

[wonderingsoul]

spotty.. i have tried. iv even made a load of things out of cardboard for them to shoot at, and stuck them on the hallway door. but they are very active ..read hyper kids... and forget the no shooting or aiming at people rule with in minutes so they get taken of them for a bit. given another chance... its a viouse circle.

[bouncyagain]

^ cogito has excellent advice as usual. No need to tell him.