Ok, need to get this off my chest and ask for opinions.
2 years ago when i was pregnant with my 2nd child me and my partner split up. He moved out, we got back together after about 2 weeks but contined to live seperatley for a while so we could work on our issues instead of just moving back together and things being the same.
When we got back together he said to me ''somebody said you where pretty the other day'' so i said ''oh yeah, who?'' and he said ''the girl that lives across the road from me'' so i said ''who is she?'' he told me that when he was moving in this girl across the road had gone over and introduced herself, they had got chatting, a couple of days later he had borrowed a brush off her to sweep his kitchen after having the lads round.
He had showed her a photo of me and she said she knew who i was and once he discribed her i knew who she was, her son goes to the same school as my son.
He said he thought this girl was a bit crazy, that she had pretty much told him her life story within 20 mins of meeting him, all sorts of crazy stuff but some personal stuff too, he said he was gobsmacked by the stuff she was coming out with. Anyway we had a bit of a laugh about his crazy neighbour and that was that.
A couple of weeks later we saw her at Asda with some guy, my DP made us keep well back saying ''if she see's us she'll start talking and we'll never get away from her'' (this girl talks A LOT, to anyone and eeryone)
Everytime i saw this girl she would come over and ask how i was getting on in my pregnancy, ask if me and DP had sorted things out yet etc
Once, after the baby was born we bumped into her at the school, it was all very friendly, she spoke to our son, DP asked her how she was, she asked how baby was doing etc
The thing is, since having my 2nd baby ive suffered from very low self-esteem, started getting jealous if DP talks to other women, my body is in pretty bad shape and i just feel like crap.
And since having baby ive just got it into my head that he must have been fucking this girl, she probably didnt lend him a broom she probably went round for sex, they where probably at it whilst i was pregnant. Ive just turned into a paranoid mess, but i cant get it out of my head. I hadnt even given it a second thought whilst i was pregnant, but since having the baby i just keep thinking something MUST have happened
Now whenever i see this girl or hear her name i get filled with rage, what the hell was she doing at my DP's house while i was pregnant, how fucking dare she???
Ive voiced my concernes to DP who says he wouldnt go with somebody like that (liar, fantasist, crazy bitch) and swears on our babys life that he never touched her.
I just dont know if its my low self-esteem causing these thoughts, or if the whole thing just sounds suspicious.
I trust myDP but i just keep thinking that, even though we got back together after a couple of weeks he was so angry with me when we split up, what if he done something because at that time he was so mad and didnt care.
He swears nothing happened, that i need to 'let it go' but since having the baby i just got it in my head that people dont invite random strangers over to their house unless its for sex.
But then i think, he told me straight away about this girl, we even joked about it, if something had gone on then surely he would have kept quiet. Or never came back to me.
Baby is just over a year old, i dont feel depressed, in fact i feel great, me and DP are happier than ever. Its just when i see that girl i get angry, i feel like screaming at DP "what where you thinking getting friendly with another woman??"
Am i just a crazy jealous person, when i read it back i actually thought "if somebody else wrote that i dont think id be suspicious"
I was actually planning on posting about this a couple of months ago, i wrote it all out then read it back before posting and just thought to myself "honestly, it doesnt sound suspicious" so i didnt post.
Forgot about it then yesterday somebody at the school mentioned this girl and i just felt angry.