anyone got any ideas? In brief dh, though entirely lovely, is the less favoured sibling. This dates back to childhood, his dad with very strong ideas on everything and his mum with depression issues. They don't love me but make an effort of sorts. We call plenty, visit often (but never enough or for long enough...) they rarely visit and call infrequently.
We long ago agreed to do what we were happy with, to behave well and to try and build on the good stuff. The inlaws are unhappy, damaged but not horrid. They can be kind and generous but can't communicate at all. Any minor effort to see if there is a problem means no calls or visits for months. There are generations of issues that have been ignored this way.
We have new baby number four, they have visited once in three weeks and not called since. In this time they have been frequently with their other son and grandchild. Dh is upset at the preference they have for our eldest over our others and more so again at the lack of contact after the birth of this baby. I hoped their enthusiasm for babies would compensate for their lack of interest/help in the difficult pregnancy. Annoyingly they talk help and enthusiasm to everyone but us, any offers are withdrawn or forgotten. I feel angry that they just don't seem to love dh that much and don't know where to go next. It feels like it will drift without huge effort from us, they haven't replied to emailed photos. I calked last and invited them back up, travel is no issue and we have school runs etc.
Are we doing too much or not enough?
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Relationships
How to deal with inlaws and their attitude to dh, children...
threeinone · 07/11/2012 15:04
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