Advanced search

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide, which can point you to expert advice and support.

Why do I feel weak

(11 Posts)
ilbo Tue 25-Oct-11 23:27:44

(namechanged for this)

For the first time in ages I am crying so much that my eyes are like big puffy holes in my face, I've cried so much today that I have a headache and I have been sick. I don't know if that is because I have eaten something bad, or is it possible that stress and upset can actually make you physically sick?

I have finally made the first move in escaping from my marriage (well, my non marriage really)

Today I told my h (he is not a dh) that I can't live with him anymore. I have told him several times before but he just laughed at me. He can't communicate, I have tried and tried to talk to him but he just doesn't do talking. It has been 8 years since I told him I couldn't live with him anymore and he kept pretending everything was ok. I have been a total wimp and have felt trapped in this crappy relationship, for reasons which I can't really post on a forum.

Today I told him I am not going to continue in this non-marriage, I said it in front of two other people and I feel so much better for doing that. He was shocked, I think he always thought I didn't mean it.

I am very scared though, I feel really worried about my future. I am sad because I am worried about my children, but I feel quite brave that I said what I needed to say and 2 other people were there when I said it.

It's quite weird to be feeling brave but very scared at the same time.

I don't need replies, just wanted to type this and get it off my chest, thanks if you read it.


hevak Tue 25-Oct-11 23:30:26

Well done for being brave smile

If you need any advice/hand holding in the future just keep posting - someone is always here (or lots of someones!) smile

HerScaryness Tue 25-Oct-11 23:36:27

good for you love. Don't worry, this panic/shock will pass.

It'll be OK. You need to get yourself to the CAB to see if there is any additional help you can get.

GypsyMoth Tue 25-Oct-11 23:38:08

Yes,well done. You will look back at this and smile!

Onemorning Tue 25-Oct-11 23:39:45


Hang in there xxx

AnyPhantomFucker Tue 25-Oct-11 23:45:27

You don't seem to be asking for anything in particular (right now) so I will just say a quiet "well done and good luck"

Any time you need more support, you know where we are

And I recommend you get as much support in RL as a you possibly can, particularly if you have a history of being talked around by him x

ilbo Wed 26-Oct-11 08:45:19

Thank you for the replies. I need to try to stay calm and work out what to do next. This morning he is acting as if nothing has happened.

ItsMeAndMyPumpkinNow Wed 26-Oct-11 08:53:10

He's acting as if nothing has happened because that's worked for him before. Don't get sucked into his reality this time: stay firmly in yours, the one where you know you can't stay with such a man.

You've told him, well done. What is your next move to get yourself out?

AnyPhantomFucker Wed 26-Oct-11 09:38:38

keep movng forward

how he reacts is not your concern

you know he will try every trick in the book...he's done them all before

so why would you fall for them again ?

Pakdooik Wed 26-Oct-11 09:54:37

Well done and keep strong

ImperialBlether Wed 26-Oct-11 11:16:45

Good for you! He is lying low and hoping you have forgotten all about it. A classic move! Remind him again today.

Join the discussion

Join the discussion

Registering is free, easy, and means you can join in the discussion, get discounts, win prizes and lots more.

Register now