Hello all, just need somewhere to vent a little about all this. It will be a long post - sorry, but thank you if you are reading this.
I have been with my OH for just over three years, not married but have a 16 month old together. He has two kids from a previous relationship (7 & 5).
He has a bad history in employment - in the last 3 years he has been fired from 4 jobs and I'm pretty fed up now. Last straw recently though, we have just moved into an amazing house, which is a rental (private) and has left us struggling a bit financially. I work part time in a very demanding and emotionally draining job, and he had got a job paying good money with lots of added benefits like salary sacrifice for Bonus Bonds etc and a pay rise after probation. I sold my car to raise some funds - only £130 but it's also saving me on tax, insurance etc. He has a car which we both use.
Essentially, after being fired from 3 jobs previously, I stood by him and he promised that this would be better. But he has just been 'let go' as his attendance was too poor. This us because he was skiving essentially, and taking holiday just because he didn't want to go to work. To add insult to injury, he lied to me about being at work, inventing details about his day when I asked him about it. He dropped our son off at his mothers (who is our childcare as I cannot afford a childminder/nursery) and then stayed at home all day.
I feel like a complete idiot right now, and the worst part of it is that I just don't love him anymore. I was at a funeral recently of a man whose wife had never been away from him in 40 years and she was utterly devastated by his passing. I realised then that actually I wouldn't be all that bothered if I was in her situation, and I'm scared that I feel that cold.
I want him out and gone, but is it really the best answer? All I want is to be with my son, he is the world to me.
Thank you for reading and I'm sorry if it's a bit ranty ?
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Relationships
I want out
serotoninbutterfly · 28/09/2011 23:19
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