Moved to new area in December - now we want to move again(18 Posts)
We moved to a new area in December - it’s an area we knew of prior to moving and is not too far from our hometown - but since moving we have realised how much we hate living here 😫
After a long drawn out move that ended up taking months longer than intended due to the sellers, we finally moved in December just before Xmas, completely ruining our daughters first Xmas.
I know it seems silly, but it made us fall out of love with the house before we even stepped through the door.
My husband and I hate living here, are constantly looking on rightmove for houses in our hometown, and know we made a massive mistake moving here.
What do we do? Do we suck it up and live here for a few more years, (knowing in our hearts that our mind won’t change and it would just be to save face)?
Or do we cut our losses and put our house on the market?
We keep flirting between ‘life’s too short’ and ‘it would be stupid to move so soon’.
Any advice would be great - we can’t talk to our families as they’ll just shake their heads and think we’re overreacting.
Difficult one ....
Without trying to pry too much, if your financial situation is good you might have options, but if not you may have to stick with it for now. Another move is another set of fees, stamp duty, etc.
Luckily for me, I've never had the same experience, although I have had a house that was liked for several years before we "fell out" with it. We didn't lose out financially, though, as over that time it had appreciated in value.
The choice between head and heart may come down to a realistic assessment of affordability.
Our financial situation is ok. Basically we doubled our mortgage thinking that the big detached house is what we wanted after moving from a very small house.
However we soon realised that a large lovely house with two sad people is not all it cracked up to be!
Now I think we’d be more than happy to downsize, reduce our mortgage and live in the same town as our whole family.
Tbh, it sounds like I already know the answer - I just don’t want the decision to be seen as idiotic by everyone else
You can't buy happiness, so goes the old adage. Downsizing may be the answer, and just chalk it down to experience.
I think it's admirable to admit that you've been mistaken! Having moved, you genuinely now know what it is you do want.
Why don't you set a time - 6 mths? - to try and settle, agree to re-evaluate then and see if you feel any differently, and if necessary, then start making plans to move back to your home town.
Life is short, do it.
Get yourselves settled where you want to be, before your DD starts attending nursery / school and making friends etc. It will be harder to uproot her then.
if you don't like it you don't like it. It will cost but move on.
but your post gives the impression that tatmas was the issue. Your daughter won't remember anything about her first christmas even if the house fell down around her ears. If that is the issue then the festival of sparkly shit and waste will be awful wherever you are.
so I hope it isn't that!
So long as it’s “we” rather than “I”, no problem. You’re allowed to change your mind. Enjoy house hunting!
We moved to the country for 6 months when the dc were little to be nearer dh’s job. Beautiful place but we ended up back in a terrace in the same city near f&f. No one judged, if they asked I just said it wasn’t right for us, we wanted a social life for us and the kids. Dh commuted with a colleague who lived near us too. Never regretted moving back.
I can only advise you from my own experience: moved to a new city in September. Loved the house; hated the new city.
I am moving again in September, although I will take a huge financial hit. The longer I stay here the more I know the decision to move here in the first instance was wrong.
Saving face is a terrible reason for doing or not doing something.
No one will judge you, in fact I reckon they’ll be over the moon to have you closer again!
The only issue selling so quickly after buying (apart from loss of money) is that potential buyers might be put off by you selling so quickly but again it’s still not enough of a reason to put it off if you’re both unhappy.
Move back. Life is too short to stick with it because it's "the right thing to do" it isn't right for you.
We did the same thing for slightly different reasons. We moved from a lovely friendly community focused village to a smaller house in another village - it was really an extension of a larger town. We thought it would be fine and that we'd make friends and settle into a new life in the area bit we drove back to the original village almost every day to walk our dog or meet friends. We realised after a year, maybe less that even though we liked the house and had done a lot of work on it, we weren't happy there and decided we'd start looking to move back to the village. We searched on rightmove, asked friends and posted on Facebook local sites we even put out leaflets asking if anyone had a property to sell and eventually found somewhere in the village - down the road from our previous house. We've been back in the village for almost 18 months now and love it and don't regret it at all.
For us location was important, the house wasn't quite what we wanted but we're having an extension built onto it to get what we want. Go for it - why wait?
Do what works best for you, but don't make any rash decisions. Think about why you bought that house in the first place. Does it have good local schools, parks, shops, transport links etc? Does the space work for your family in the future, you may need the space for more kids? Don't be swayed by the process you went through to get to the house or it spoiling Christmas though. Your child won't remember a thing. Just plan on making next Christmas bigger & better.
We've been trying to move for over a year now & basically cancelled Christmas in order to have viewings. We didn't even have a tree. I was so upset, because I love Christmas, so I understand how you feel. Can I suggest giving it until next year? Focus on giving your daughter, & yourselves a great Christmas & then see how you feel in the new year. If you still feel the same then at least you gave it a good go!
Move! We are. We moved last October to be near a school that turned out to be awful. We’re moving back ASAP.
Get your house on the market now regardless of whether you have found something. Might take a while to sell.
Could you rent yours out and rent back in the new area just so you can be sure that it's the right decision? I agree that buyers will look immediately at the sold price of your house which is readily available and if they see it was only bought 6 months ago, they'll think there's something wrong with the house or the area.
Having said that, I do think it takes a while to settle, particularly after the birth of a baby when you're perhaps missing your pre-baby life perhaps / tired / bored dare I say it on mat leave?
If you can afford it, do it! I've been in a house I'm unhappy in for 4 years now so I've definitely given it a good go, it's not got any better!
Ours is on the market now thank goodness, don't wait as long as we did!
Thanks for all the responses! Great help.
The Christmas thing is definitely not why I want to move - it was just sort of the straw that broke the camels back in regards to a very long drawn out process. (The sellers had told us they were moving into a rental so that we could move everything along quicker...until they found a new build that hadn’t even been built yet that they had their heart set on).
Basically it took so many months to move that by the six month of waiting we had lost all love for it.
But I think we’ve decided that January is our aim. Just so we can give it a real shot.
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