How does your school handle violent and disruptive behaviour in very young children?

[helpfulornot]

Hi,

DS1 is 4 and he has just started Reception. It is five days a week from nine till 4, he went to pre-school at the same school for same hours.

He has had a terrible week, three days out of four (so far!) he has been violent and disruptive in the classroom, kicking other children, etc, copying bad behaviour. He has been excluded from some playground time.

His teacher has spoken to me about his behaviour each afternoon, and has asked me to speak to him about it at home. We now have a set of rules written (no hurting, no breaking, etc), I have been trying to get him to bed earlier, and have been trying to help him eat better, in the hope it will help, in the meeantime I pick him up each afternoon with dread, wondering what he will have got up to!

I am also worried that we are not very far from him being asked to leave.

How would you and your school handle this situation?

[bigTillyMint]

Oh dear, poor you. Was he difficult at home / when with other children before he started school?

[bigTillyMint]

Oh dear, poor you. Was he difficult at home / when with other children before he started school?

[helpfulornot]

He's always been wilful, and does like to be part of a group so if anyone goes off he will copy.

He was at this school last year, but now he's in a different class with a different teacher these issues are coming to light.

I don't know the abilities of the other children, but maybe that could be causing some problems....

Have to leave soon to pick him up, so hope it's good news today...

[cory]

I've only seen this type of problem from the other end so to speak (dcs on the receiving end ifyswim). I think the infants school did minor punishments of the stay-inat-luch-break type. Think it would take a lot to get a child excluded at that age around here (and rightly so). Dinner ladies are warned to keep an eye, the child is warned that he will not be allowed to play outside if he hurts somebody- that sort of thing.

There are problems, of course, with keeping an already over-excited child in at breaktime, they're probably just the ones that need to blow off steam. On the other hand, it might reassure another child who is too frightened to go out and play if he thinks he's going to get knocked down (my ds in reception). Tricky balance, I agree.

Hope things go better for you soon.

[dustystar]

I think you need to ask them what strategies they are using/ plan to use with him to help him behave appropriately in the classroom and playground. Simply excluding him from the playground is not a very good way of dealing with it at his age and certainly doesn't address the issue of why he is behaving in this way.

[snottynoses]

Excluding him might help the other kids DS has been on the receiving end of another little boys bad behaviour and is terrified of play time

[cornsilk]

It's strange that there's such a difference in behaviour when going from nursery to reception in the same school though. How is he finding the work - could he be having difficulties that are frustrating him?

[helpfulornot]

I agree Cornsilk it is strange.

I had occurred to me that maybe he was finding the work too hard or too easy, and he told me it was too easy, which would tie in with him "behaving" when he's got one on one time.

The pre-school was a lot less structured, he could what he wanted when he wanted, within reason, now the actually have a timetable! Maybe he is struggling with the extra structure.

I can see us having to see the teacher, hopefully in the meantime he might start to improve his behaviour.

Thx

[tengreenbottles]

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