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daughter leaving tommrow

(13 Posts)
mdrooney Mon 21-Jul-08 13:45:56

My Daughter is leaving her primary school school tommrow and Iam dreading the end of year assembley, she is the only one going on to her secondry school and she is very upset about leaving her primary school all the girls are going off to diffrent schools with 3 at the most going to the same school (buts thats a diffrent topic) most of the boys are going to the same school she will be following her sister to her secondry who went last year and loves it, but my dd has been very quite the last few days and I know that she is upset that her and her friends are going to diffrent schools and its breaking my heart to see her unhappy, I know from previous years that it all gets very emotional on the last day with the y6 and really know that I have to hold it togther for her, but I am feeling sad too as her primary school has been wonderfull and feeling its the end of a era for me too after being involved in school life which doesnt really happen in secondry school. Ive peen really positive around her saying she will have the best of both worlds her old friends MSN is great and new ones but she is really sad at the moment.

MamaG Mon 21-Jul-08 13:49:52

You probably will cry

So will she

The holidays will be hard for her - I went to a secondary school where I knew nobody and i spent the holidays dreading it and raging at mya parents taht they didn't send me to the (frankly, horrible rough) school where all my friends were going!

i think if you prepare for that, you will deal with it better. You know you're making the right decision, it will just take a few months until she's completely 100% happy again (when she's settled at new school).

If your older DD goes there, does she have any friends with younger siblings who will also be starting, so you could maybe meet up in the hols? Just thinking it might help her to have some familiar faces.

Not wanting to upset you, I just went through it from the child's perspective and wanted to prepare you a bit!

Take the tissues to assembly, good luck.

PuppyMonkey Mon 21-Jul-08 13:54:04

Did she get a proper induction day at new school? Think that helps, meeting new people. Also might be worth contacting new school to tactfully point out she might be a bit lonely at first cos a lot of her friends have gone to diff school - and could form teacher just keep an eye on it...

All you can do is give her lotsa hugs and possibly chocolate. grin And rest assured that within about the first day, she'll have a new set of friends and will not even be giving it a second thought!

My dd leaves primary on Weds. Such a weird time isn't it? Growing up so fast... sad

MaryAnnSingleton Mon 21-Jul-08 13:54:09

my ds leaves on Wednesday and it's Leavers Assembly tomorrow - I feel very down today - he is fine ! he is looking forward to the new school and is lucky enough to be going with prsent classmates...of course the emotional bit will probably rub off on him too - but I think I'm feeling it more keenly somehow - my only child etc sad - so sym pathies to you mdrooney and hope you can hold it together - I shall be clutching my tissues...

herbietea Mon 21-Jul-08 13:54:38

Message withdrawn

mdrooney Mon 21-Jul-08 14:08:53

My dd had a inducton day and she came out after making one friend who said she didnt want to go there too, and she has been msn her, I know tommrow will be sad and I know most of her friends parents are upset too, but we are going to the park for a big picnic after so it might lighten the mood, and she might feel better when we go shopping for her new uniform it just doesnt seem that real at the monment.

roisin Mon 21-Jul-08 16:20:19

ds1 finished primary on Friday. He had a very emotional week, but is much better now that the show/party/leaver's assembly etc are all over with.

I have no memories whatsoever of 'leaving day' at any of the schools I went to: it just didn't seem to be an "occasion".

GrapefruitMoon Tue 22-Jul-08 12:19:07

I don't remember finishing primary either Roisin.... wonder if we sometimes make it harder for kids these days by making a big deal about every single thing. But then we didn't put on school plays or concerts for parents either and everyone really enjoyed the play Yr6 did the other night!

Our leavers assembly is tomorrow and I know there will be a few tears shed (hopefully not by me...)

teslagirl Tue 22-Jul-08 13:06:42

I agree that we are all expected to make a big song and dance about every occasion these days! I'm SURE it won't be long before we do those ridiculous nursery school graduations they have in the States complete with 4 year olds in gowns and mortar boards! I, too can't remember my last day at primary, poss as I was SO excited at going onto Big School. Though we had absolutely NO Finale after the end of 'A' levels, 7 years later. We literally walked out of the school hall after our final exam- and some of us never saw each other again...

Also- and on shaky ground here, am I alone in being a bit fed up with the whole 'end of school year' run up? Or run down as it is at our infants! Really, we've had assemblies, picnics, 3 (!) 'fun' days out, a disco, a talent show, and art show... I stopped sending in the book bag and PE kit a good week ago as it was obviously a waste of time! And it was DS2's teacher who told me a fortnight ago that I had to keep a gentle pressure up on him over the summer re literacy and maths...pity THEY'RE not! But AM I an elderly curmudgeon or ARE we beginning to make too much of what is, after all, just another event in time? Incidentally, it's DS2's last day in Infants school tomorrow!

kingprawntikka Tue 22-Jul-08 13:13:36

My Daughter has just finished year seven. It has gone so fast. I remember her leaving day last year, she went on to a different secondary to two out of her three closest friends. When year seven ended last week, we were chatting about how it had flown by, and she talked about how sad and tearful she had been this time last year.This time last year she was upset about everyone she was leaving behind (even the boys much to her own suprise!!)and felt it would never be the same. Now she says it is strange to think she was that upset. This next bit will i hope be reassuring to you. Two of her closest friends went to a different secondary to her . She still sees them both regularly, they meet up,come for tea, have days out, sleepovers etc. The friend who went to secondary with her she doesn't bother with anymore. No big fall out or anything , they are just in different classes for all lessons and grew apart. She has three new best friends. Non of them knew each other before this year . They share lots of lessons and have become very close. One of her old friends slept over recently, and asked my daughter if she wishes they were stil in primary and all together.I lingered by the door to hear her reply! She said that she didn't wish that because she still had her old friends, and felt like she had known her new friends forever too. The new friendships weren't formed instantly, and up to probably february half term she was still finding her feet within her new relationships, but now she says she knows she has three new best friends and is totally happy

bionicmum Wed 23-Jul-08 10:24:49

Hello all
This is my first ever posting on this site, but I came here for comfort really. I'm in a bit of a state, and I'm never normally this emotional. It was my youngest daughter's last day at nursery yesterday (the same nursery my three girls have attended) and today is my eldest daughter's last day at First School, and I'm just an emotional wreck. The kids are fine, so why can't I cope? I keep finding myself quietly sobbing, despite wanting to hold it together for the kids. Why am I being so pathetic? Is anyone else being this silly?
Thanks for any advice.

mdrooney Wed 23-Jul-08 11:42:04

Hi Yesterday was very emotional, and both me and my daughter had a cry but it was also a real upliffting assembley about there time and the school and I realized how lucky we had been to go to such a wonderfull school, and all the great friends that we both have made, and we had a great time on mass in the park for a picnic after which lightened the mood. Im sure now that all the emotion is over of leaving hopefully my daughter will feel a bit more postive about going to her new school and will make new friends to add to her old ones from primary.
I think personally for me its that thing about losing them a bit, as the change once they go to secondry school is huge also I think its that scary feeling that your babies dont need you as much (although they do but driffrently)

bionicmum Wed 23-Jul-08 12:53:11

Hi
I think you're right - it's a lot to do with them not needing you so much, which is unavoidable as they grow up I suppose. I'll try to focus on the positive as you suggest (though it's really hard - however, I guess 6 weeks of summer holiday will probably cure any sadness - I'll be desperate for them to return to school in a couple of weeks!) Got our school meet-up in the park today so us mums will all be able to share our woes. Funny how dads don't really seem to feel the same isn't it. Thanks very much for your advice.

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