I have a problem with a teacher but dont know what to do

(25 Posts)
rosydreams Mon 13-May-19 14:47:13

Hiya my name is Jo my daughter is currently in year 3 at school.At first the school had a good head teacher and she had a supportive teacher.But when year 2 rolled around the teacher left and so did the head teacher.We got a new head teacher and then many teachers started leaving.

I have experience in working in childcare and was working as a playground assistant at the time,i had been there over a year.I started to notice changes as the new head came in.Like simple things instead of sitting down to pray at lunch they now pray in the queue didn't seem anything really.But then there was more concerning changes like even though my first aid certificate was out of date i was encouraged to administer first aid instead of sending children to the office.

Another playground assistant left a mother of my daughters friend she took her daughter with her.Apparently during a discussion with the head about her life the heads comments were that it was her fault she was in a abusive relationship.(she had just left a difficult relationship).Well that was strange for a head to say.

Next they hired two new playground assistants and although i was reassured and given a contract for the next few months.They said they could not afford to keep me.This is just before i would be there for 2 years therefore would have had more rights.

During the next year my daughters teachers were changed over and over again.No regularity homework never checked reading logs never checked.When she went into year three they finally got a permanent teacher but i still feel a distinct lack of attention given.Not only that but multiple reports of bullying have been encored.

Now my daughter is delayed she took effort but when she was a good teacher she made good progress.Now i feel shes falling more and more behind.Whats worst is i am hearing rumors that apparently her new teacher is incredibly impatient and shouts at her to the point of crying.I know and understand kids need discipline but there is a line.

Now after talking to other parents i have learnt more interesting information.A couple of months ago a email was sent out saying a year 6 teacher was leaving due to parents bullying her.Now its come to light that the parents had genuine concerns that the teacher was acting inappropriately .Telling kids intimate details about her life.That and the parents asked about what was being taught in the curriculum .This was not bullying but high lighting genuine concerns about conduct and teaching.Yet the parents were treated like trouble makers some told there were no longer allowed on site unless with a chaperone.

I have also been informed that a student was expelled because they didn't want to work with the parent.Which worry's me that if i try to talk with the head teacher i will be treated as if i am the parent of a undisciplined child not one who has extra needs.

Problem is this is all hear say i have no proof,i don't know how to protect my daughter and i don't feel like i can approach the head teacher i don't know what to do

OP’s posts: |
Pipandmum Mon 13-May-19 14:50:28

Do you have a board of governors? A PTL? There must be some accountability somewhere.

rosydreams Mon 13-May-19 14:53:49

i don't know how to contact the board of governors but i will ask other parents see what they say

OP’s posts: |
Seeline Mon 13-May-19 14:57:30

Virtually all you have reported is hearsay, gossip and rumour

The only thing you actually know about is your daughter's performance. In the first instance I would ask for a meeting with her teacher to discuss this, see whether she really is falling behind, and if so, what measures the school will put in place to help her and how you can support her at home.

Lonecatwithkitten Mon 13-May-19 16:57:47

As Seeline says take out all the gossip and rumours and just talk about the fact that your daughter is not making progress and you are concerned.

azulmariposa Mon 13-May-19 17:28:46

All of the complaints procedures will be on the school website. Or you could ask at reception and they should give you a copy.

Pud2 Mon 13-May-19 22:17:05

What’s a PTL? Do you mean PTA? Not sure how they would be relevant in this situation.

As others have said, remove the gossip and focus on the facts that affect you and your child. If you have concerns about your child’s performance then speak to their teacher. If you feel you are being treated unfairly in your workplace, as an employee in the school, then you could contact your union for advice, or make a complaint to the chair of governors (complaints procedure). Be very sure that you only present factual and accurate information relevant to you and your job. It may also be worth you reading the school’s whistleblowing policy if you have concerns around safeguarding.


nonicknameseemsavailable Tue 14-May-19 11:29:26

PTL could be parent teacher liaison?

Slh2211 Wed 15-May-19 18:15:52

Hi everyone! My daughter hates water won’t drink it so I make her a really weak Vimto or mix flavoured water with tap water for school it’s the only way I can’t get her to drink. Well today after school her teacher came to me to tell me that all the children had been drinking each other’s drinks 😕 and when they had tried Violets well they all discovered she had weak juice which meant the teacher found out. Instead of just informing me at the end of the day the teacher poured my daughters drink away and filled it up with water on one of the hottest days of the year. My daughter was distraught! And came out of school with a full bottle of tap water which she hadn’t drank. I told her teacher that it’s the only way I can’t get her to drink she then informed me that it’s school policy not to have juice and then said to make sure it’s weak. It was weak! I am not happy about this teacher upsetting my child to the point that she thought she was doing something wrong when it was in fact me. Has anyone else experienced anything like this? How did you handle it?

viques Wed 15-May-19 18:33:02

You might be better to start your own thread for advice.

The problem with water with vimto(really??? Anagram of vomit for a reason IMO) or any other dilute squash is a) if one child has it they all want it b) even dilute squash if spilled makes a sticky mess, and encourages ants and flies . Water just makes things wet.

Have you tried freezing a bottle of water so that it is very cold, at least for a reasonable length of time, or putting a small slice of lemon or orange into the bottle to "flavour" it. Put a mark on the bottle and ask your daughter to drink down to the mark every day for a week. If she can manage a small amount you can slowly increase it. What does she drink at home? If you make sure she has a good drink in the morning before school she will get away with smaller drinks during the day until home time without dehydrating.

Quietlife333 Wed 15-May-19 18:52:24

Sounds like you can see lots of negative changes and you aren’t happy. Your child doesn’t sound too happy either and the head sounds unhelpful. Would you consider changing schools?

LJdorothy Wed 15-May-19 19:03:19

In class, I would pour away juice and replace it with tap water too if the water bottle was for class use. Spilled juice is much more of a problem than spilled water and the bottles leak or get tipped constantly over the desks. Asides from that, it's really bad for her teeth to be sipping juice from a bottle all day. I can guarantee she will drink water at school if she is thirsty but not if you keep offering her a choice.

Slh2211 Wed 15-May-19 19:37:12

So you would pour an upset 4 year olds drink away in front of her and replace it with water she won’t drink on one of the hottest days of the year. Glad you wasn’t my teacher. And I do apologise I am new to this site and didn’t realise I posted on someone else’s thread so I will leave you all to it.

LJdorothy Wed 15-May-19 20:47:15

If you explain the problem, the children understand and don't get remotely upset. They don't want ants in their classroom or a sticky mess over their work either.
Your child will drink water when you stop giving her vimto. You're the one doing her harm, not the teacher.

Slh2211 Wed 15-May-19 21:14:33

Not all children, they’re not all the same. I tried stopping the juice for a week and my daughter didn’t drink at school the whole week. I would rather give her very weak juice then her get dehydrated. You have no right to say I am causing my daughter harm, I am her mother I would die for her I am here to protect her and if that means breaking the rules every once in a while then so be it. Not a very nice thing to say that to another mother you know nothing about.

mollysshadow Wed 15-May-19 21:18:07

Is this 2 threads in one ???!!

LJdorothy Wed 15-May-19 22:28:28

You may feel you have the right to break the school's rule, which are there for excellent practical reasons, but as it's the school's rule the teacher has every right to enforce it within her classroom. And I'm sorry you think I'm not being nice, but you really are harming her teeth by allowing her to sip Vimto from a water bottle.

Slh2211 Wed 15-May-19 23:17:44

Yes she does have every right to enforce the school rules in her classroom but to then tell me yes she can have really weak juice in her drinking bottle after she had already embarrassed and upset my daughter for having really weak juice in her drinking bottle isn’t right. I do not allow my daughter to have sweets only chocolate as a treat so a tiny bit of juice in her water to mask the taste that makes her gag isn’t going to hurt her it is going to stop her from getting dehydrated at school and other health problems in the future. You may think that all rules and law out there are to protect us but I assure you not all of them are.

Myothercarisalsoshit Wed 15-May-19 23:25:35

Water doesn't actually have a taste though does it? Your little one is playing you and you are reinforcing it by offering her alternatives.There are good reasons why children in school only drink water. Yes the teacher could have handled it differently without upsetting your child but she's in the right really. Sweets would be better for her teeth than letting her swill sugary water around them all day. You sound ridiculous and are most definitely 'that parent'.

purpleboy Wed 15-May-19 23:29:51

Didn't you already start a thread on this? You were told pretty much the same thing on that one too?hmm

LJdorothy Thu 16-May-19 19:30:53

The taste of water makes her gag?? I've heard it all now. The teacher can't win here, can she? She doesn't want your child to have juice, as it's against school rules, but you are kicking up a fuss, so she is attempting to appease you. Why are you angry with her?

Yvemen Thu 16-May-19 22:04:04

Is this for real??? 😂

The teacher is right, you are wrong. For the good of your little girl, quit caving in and give her water.

HopefulHattie Sat 01-Jun-19 18:37:08

Good for that teacher. Rules apply to all. We are so lucky to have fresh drinking water on tap!

OKBobble Mon 03-Jun-19 06:49:43

So back to the Original Post - there is a lot of "other parents say...." in there. Stop with the gossip. You are obviously bitter that you were fired and are looking for excuses to have issues. No wonder teachers are leaving if the parents are hounding them! No doubt of allegations were made about the higher year group teacher they have been investigated and found groundless hence the need for the teacher to have to have a chaperone to prevent false allegations against them.

The only real.issue that needs addressing is whether your daughter is falling behind and needs additional support. Address that issue only.

TitianaTitsling Mon 03-Jun-19 07:03:27

Agree with pp that the majority of the post is hearsay and random gossip. Is this school in the UK? As l don't think schools can expell pupils just because a teacher doesnt like a parent- it's much more drawn out than that!

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