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Would you change your DC's school in this situation.

12 replies

trixymalixy · 11/05/2017 20:31

My DC go to a lovely village school, we've been very happy with it. It used to be that it fed into one of the best secondary schools in our area. At some point that was changed to feed into a very poor school but almost all of the children still got into the best school through placing requests due to the villages proximity to the good school.

This was the situation when DS started primary school, but as time has gone on it has become harder to get placing requests granted.

We moved into catchment for the good secondary to ensure the DC got in but kept them at the village primary. This year for the first time ever no one from the village school got in.

We are looking at the DC potentially not going to secondary with any of their friends now.

We are thinking of moving them to our new catchment primary as there are places. My thinking is that they take the pain of making new friends now in a small primary school rather than later at a huge secondary.

The new primary is walking distance rather than driving. It's probably a better school. The class sizes are bigger than the village school. The DC will know one person each in their class as others have moved.

I know DS in particular will be upset at leaving his friends behind, he's in p5 (Scotland), so two years left of primary.

Would you do this? Any advice?

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RedScissors · 11/05/2017 21:21

If you and they are both happy, no, I'd keep them there. Do they do any extracurriculars where they could meet other children going to the secondary?

They won't be the only ones who don't know anyone. Plus, many children will go to secondary and drift away from their primary friends.

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MrsJamin · 11/05/2017 21:23

If all the kids from the new primary one go to the secondary then yes, definitely especially as you can walk and it's a good school. It's a lot lot easier to make friends when you're at primary school than at secondary school, especially as it's so much smaller.

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Starlight2345 · 11/05/2017 21:24

I am not sure I would move school if you children are happy and doing well there..That I would say is a real gamble..

I agree look at clubs local.

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Thethingswedoforlove · 11/05/2017 22:29

I wd definitely say not to move if you are all happy with ththat current school. Dcs make friends in new schools anyway and they might be split up from any new friends they might make from new primary school? Plus unsettling the dc at this stage just doesn't seem worth it to me.

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Squishedstrawberry4 · 11/05/2017 22:35

No I don't think I'd move them unless I was unhappy with the village school. Instead I'd help the DC join cubs and other local clubs so he met kids with similar interests.

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trixymalixy · 12/05/2017 09:12

I guess I'm just worried as I went to secondary on my own and it took me 3 or 4 years to make good friends.

Ah I'm really torn as to what to do for the best.

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rubberducker · 12/05/2017 09:37

I went to secondary with all of my best friends from primary. Within 6 months we had all drifted apart and into different friendship groups, so from my experience you could go through the hassle of moving them to a new primary now and still find that they make different friends in secondary.

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bojorojo · 12/05/2017 10:42

Don't forget your children are not you. Even if they go with primary friends, these friendships can change very rapidly. Stay put at primary and be pleased you have a good secondary to go to. Also children from your year group may get into the school. It will depend on catchment, siblings etc. My two both went to secondary on their own and made friends rapidly.

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GuestWW · 12/05/2017 11:15

My DC is the only one going to a different secondary school in their cohort. They will survive, secondary school is all mixed up and they find new friends. Stick with the school you are happy with.

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BarbarianMum · 12/05/2017 13:55

Ds1 is the only one of his friends going to the secondary we chose. We offered ds2 the chance to change schools now to avoid the same situation when he goes up and he's chosen to stay where he is. He's 9. If he were younger (Y1 or Y2) we'd have moved him.

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Lymmmummy · 13/05/2017 11:44

did you say what year DC were in as this is a factor - I think upto yr 3 I would change after that perhaps more problematic to do so - though not impossible

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MilkRunningOutAgain · 13/05/2017 17:54

We were in a similar situation and stayed put at the primary. DS went to a secondary with 1 girl from his primary ( intake of 250 a year). He wasn't keen to go and really got quite upset in yr 6. I nearly buckled but realised that while it would be very easy to move him to the unpopular secondary his friends would be at, it would be almost impossible to move the other way. So he went and liked it and is now happily settled and sees the school is a better fit for him - it's so much bigger and he loves sport and this school has given him so many more sporting opportunities than the other one would have. And its results are better too. DD is in yr 6 now, and although she is worried she sort of accepts that she'll follow in DS's footsteps.

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