staying in touch with pre-school friends

[Salyo]

My husband and I are thinking about moving house to a new area before we need to start applying for schools for our eldest DC.

Although we would be living in an area that we prefer, one of our biggest concerns is that we would be leaving behind all the friends (both our parent/NCT friends and our children's friends) behind. The area we would move to is about 45 mins drive away.

I was told by one mum, that if we moved we might lose contact with most of our friends here but in the long run it won't matter as we'll make new friends, particularly when our eldest starts school and attends one or two after school sports/music lessons etc and that we wouldn't have much time spare for old friends anyway.

From parents with children in infant/primary schools - I'd like to know (regardless if you moved house or not), how often, if at all do you see mummy and daddy friends you made before your child started school.

Thank you x

[ZenNudist]

Both my parents and in laws have life long friends they made when their children were born, in some case kept in touch with as they moved.

Some friends you keep some you don't, that would be true if you stayed where you are or if you moved.

[redskytonight]

I don't see any. They mostly moved away, or our children weren't friends any more. 45 minutes is quite a long distance to expect people to come to see you so you'd be doing most of the running. Bear in mind as the DC get older they have more on after school so maintaining a friendship is very tough.

[Obeliskherder]

We don't keep up with our children's nursery friends. We have an NCT reunion about 3 times a year. Love the people in that group but we're all so busy juggling school stuff, work stuff and kids' activities. These days we just meet in the evening without children and husbands.

[Witchend]

The only people I keep in close contact (ie see rather than contact) are those who I have interest in common and get on well with.

Dm had a group of mums that met weekly through baby and preschool years. They met perhaps half a dozen times in total between the children going to school and about 30 years later. Now in retirement they meet about once a month.

[noramum]

It can work, especially if you also see the parents as YOUR friends.

We moved when DD was 3, one year before she started school. We kept her at the old nursery for practical reasons but she attended a very different school.

We consciously made the effort to meet on a regular basis, have playdates, share childcare, go together on a regular basis for meals/drinks/family time. We do trips together (3 mums and 6 children to Chessington) etc.

It helps that 4 of them share a hobby, so we see each other for this as well once a month.

Text and Facebook is vital as well.

I see all the other three families as my friends, I know I can ring them in an emergency and visa vie. DD and one other girl are now finishing Y4 and I can't see the contact getting less.

Other children we saw regularly during nursery times - lost contact.