My 12 year old is unhappy at secondary school. People won't talk to her

[Doughnut123]

Please can you advise me. My lovely 12 year old daughter really dislikes school. She's sweet and clever, gentle and very artistic. She shouldn't have a problem making friends, you would think. She's easy going and quiet. But , she's finding secondary school really hard. Most of her close fiends from the junior school, go to a different school, so she has had to try to make new ones. The girls she is with in her classes and her form, seem to be quite bitchy. One minute they seem ok, next, they won't talk to her. They aren't talking to her more often than not. She has her lunch alone. I could cry for her. It's horrible. The thing is, the 'nice' girls are all on the other side of the year, so she can't really befriend them easily. Other than talking to the head of year, I don't know what to do. I've encouraged her to try to talk to these girls and ask them why they won't speak to her, but I understand. She doesn't really like them. They've become a clique I think. All copying each other's look. She's not girly, she just loves riding and art.
Girls can be such bitches, can't they? Does anyone have any good ideas on how to deal with this? Thank you.

[noblegiraffe]

If you talk to the head of year, if your DD is that unhappy, they may agree to change form groups.

[bigTillyMint]

Definitely go and talk to the HoY - she shouldn't have to be that unhappy.

[Sparklingbrook]

YY talk to Form Tutor and HOY.

Is moving schools completely out of the question?

[Earlybird]

What a difficult situation. You both have my sympathies.

Is there anyone she'd like to get to know better? Anyone with similar interests?

Maybe school isn't the right place to begin. Could you invite a few potential friends over (one at a time) so the girls could spend time together on the weekend or during half term? Maybe she could begin to lay the foundation for friendship in that way, and it would be much easier for her at school.

[Ilovemybedbaby]

Hi op
Go to the school, speak with her head of year it will be possible for her to be moved to a class where she at least knows some of the girls. Secondary is hard enough without this going on.
Yes they can be very bitchy, my dd is in her first year to and has had quite abit of stick, but I just kept complaining till it got sorted out, she seems a lot better now.

[ragged]

Being without a gang sucks.
Could she join some lunchtime clubs? Drama, sport, craft, chess, something?

[Doughnut123]

Thank you so much to all of you. I will talk to the head of year this week and ask if she could possibly move to a different form group. Early bird, I will see if I can encourage her to invite some girls over too. There's a lot going on for her at home too. Her dad and I are going through an amicable divorce and we're moving house. Moving from the house we've lived in for 8 years. She doesn't want to move. But her dad reckons he can't afford to buy a house unless we sell this one.
So, she has a lot to cope with. Thank you for your understanding and your kindness.