have just gone through dd2's phone

[Notmyidea]

And found she has charged a friend £1.20 to forge a sick note. She knows I check her phone, so I don't have to justify having found it, but I could do with talking through what to say to her in the morning, and to the other set of parents...:(
I'm most pissed off by the dishonesty, wondering what friend could be up to, how do I not make her more sneaky by going ballistic at her...help!

[TiredDog]

How old is she?

I have girls and have not found going ballistic helpful with them as teenagers. I can't say I found any miracle helpful idea either... But talking with them calmly and openly seemed best.

I once took DD out for a lunch in a pub where we ate and had a civil conversation over something fairly serious that she had done. We started our meal calmly...she guessed it was coming...polite chit chat then a calm and caring anyway... I've invited you out.....

She felt that I cared enough to make time, spend money and treat her like an adult. She was a little evasive but the most open I could expect her being a teen and all that

[Notmyidea]

She is 11, year seven. I've been trying to get her to branch out in her friendships as she has a very domineering "BFF" but I have huge reservations about some of the friends she's making...

[RhondaJean]

I'm sorry but I couldn't help but laugh. I thought you were going to have found I appropriate conversations with an older boy/online bullying/talking about self harm.

Okay it's not right but please keep perspective, it's pretty enterprising of her and I would be much much more concerned if she was the one buying the sick note rather than writing it.

[Notmyidea]

Going out for a calm chat sounds like a good idea. Don't think she'll try to shut me up by crying loudly in public...

[Notmyidea]

I am a bit impressed with the enterprise, but I don't like any of the reasons an eleven year old might be bunking off, I don't like that even if dd in some, misguided way thought she was helping a friend out she could make something from it.

[NoComet]

was the child sciving, in which case it is very naughty, or just going to get in trouble for forgetting a note.

I know my BF forged a note for a mate who had permission to watch her brothers passing out parade, because her form teacher has an unbalanced sadistic bully.

[Notmyidea]

Skiving

[TiredDog]

If my 11yr old was assisting someone to skive I'd be very concerned. What will she be doing at 15 ...

It's hopefully an immature, swept along by her peers mistake. Worth a calm chat of the W H A T on earth were you thinking? variety rather than straight in you are going to be punished

I really would want to know the thinking behind my DD if she did this.

[Nataleejah]

That's funny...
At our school basically everybody did write sick notes for eachother, but the thing that bugs me up to now, that teachers... They did take them for real :O and they're supposed to be adults...

[themonsteratemyspacebar]

I wouldn't automatically think they were up to anything sinister. Do you know the full details? As in was it a sick note for a day off school? Or a sick note to get out p.e?

If its the latter, it is definately common practice and i wouldnt worry about it at all. The teachers see it a couple of times everyday. Plus, they still have to watch, just get away with participating!

If its for whole days off then i agree its a little more serious. But please get your facts correct before going in all guns blazing.

[SavoyCabbage]

I love that it is 1.20. Not £1. unhelpful

[Notmyidea]

It was for a day off school. Friend convinced her mother there was an inset day after half term to get out of a science test. Then got dd to do the note. £1.20 is the price of a hot chocolate and a cookie from the canteen. Friend also spun her mother a line about there being a cake sale to get the cash. Both have had parental bollockings and are in isolation at school as we speak.