Hi, So sorry I vanished for a few days after all of the support.
I think last week was a watershed moment for me - everything piled on top of me. I have had 1 session of counselling so far - and a few things have made sense:
with regard to the boys - I am pretty harsh on myself but not on others. The slightest sign that people aren't happy I assume its because of me. Esp if people criticise me - I tend to withdraw.
Not good if your a mom!
So, knowing this I was able to take a step back from my DS's comments and stood my ground. He's 13 - of course he's going to push boundaries doesn't mean he hates me!
It worked - small steps - but it worked. He now gets the school bus He missed it Monday - lapsed into bad habit and so walked (I was behind making sure he was OK but he didn't know that).
With regard to DH he is home approx 8 days out of 28. I feel uncomfortable about this - he didn't want me to work but I do feel 'beholden' to him.
I asked him if we could and he suggested that we ...SKYPE!!!!!! So I have a way to go on that front yet.
I have also enquired at the local RNLI about a fundraising volunteer post or a merchandising assistant.
So, small steps, but I feel as if I've 'switched on' again.
Thanks to everyone - it was good to know that most of what I felt was normal - I was just making a mountain out of a molehill.
Chloe
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ChloeR32 · 30/04/2013 10:38
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