12yo DS - usual preteen behaviour (I think)

[bonkers20]

I'm just going to blather on a bit here so please excuse me.

DS is turning into an alien being that I don't recognise nor particularly like some of the time.

DH: please can you collect any library books you have.
DS: I didn't ask you to get them, so no I won't

Me: I don't like it when you interrupt me
DS: Well I'll do it again then.

He thinks it's funny and that he's a "bad man" because he got an after school detention.

We get a lot of him HAVING to have the last word or being really rude and I just don't know how to handle it.

I did have a good talk with him yesterday about how we will not tolerate rudeness or disrespect in our house and he does acknowledge his behaviour is rude and upsetting to others, but in response to asking why he does it he says "I don't know".

I think he is having a testosterone surge at the moment as he'd grown visibly in the last couple of month (like 3 shoes sizes in 2 months or something).

It's not all bad. He's doing very well academically, he's absolutely wonderful with his toddler brother and he can be trusted on his own at home (and to get on with the chores I leave him).

Thanks.

[kreecherlivesupstairs]

DD has clearly changed sex and aged two years without me knowing.
Yesterday, no in fact for the whole of the weekend, she has been a little sod.
We had a long talk about how noone likes a know it all, and how she doesn't always have to have the last word (she said she did )
I honestly feel that someone has moved a switch in DDs brain to 'aggravate' and 'annoy'.
Only eight years until she leaves home.

[CeliaFate]

Yep, it's the same at our house. Dd age 10 is obnoxious a lot of the time. I try and smile, nod and ignore as much as I can then I down a bottle of wine once she's in bed

[nooka]

My ds is 12 and also gets a bit uppity at times. We tend to slap him down (metaphorically of course) quite sharpish and he responds fairly well (usually get an apology, sometimes get the sulks). I think it probably helps that he has another year of elementary, so less exposure to having to be 'hard'.

[bellavita]

Wait till they get to 14!!

DS can be a cocky little sod. We don't tolerate it either, but it just seems to pour out of his mouth.

He however still gives me hugs, plants kisses on my cheek, tells me he loves me, picks me up off the floor with a huge grin on his face as he is now taller than me so I s'pose I need to be grateful for something

[lindipops]

DS is 12 and am having exactly the same type of conversations. He always tries to have the last word and answers back thinking he is being really smart and funny. He is doing well at school and is still gives me big hugs etc. I find it hard to handle at times especially when he is backchatting me when I am trying to point out that it isn't acceptable etc etc and why etc. I then turn into evil mum and confiscate console controls until he apologises etc etc.