Can a preschool do this?

[MamaGlow]

My 3-year-old son recently started at the nursery, which is part of the local primary school.

We were told there would be a staggered start to help them adjust to the school day. One hour on the first day with parents, extending up to being on their own until the end of the day.

My son loves school, has not cried, made friends, and so far his finish time has been stopped at 1pm.

The teachers won't allow him to stay longer because "he doesn't listen." I've tried to find out more but they just say he doesn't always listen in the afternoon,doesn't help tidy up and on one occasion waved a stick at the other kids. He has also laughed in their face when they asked him to help, etc.

He has no learning difficulties and apart from this behaviour he loves all his friends and is generally having a ball.

But they refuse to let him stay until 2:55 pm.

I was told back in April I had a full time place for him at nursery and have been waiting for his education to begin for months. Prior to joining we were informed all new starters had to be able to get dressed alone and go to the toilet alone - he does all this fine. Nothing about listening 100% of the time.

So I'm confused as to how they can stop him being there full-time based on these criticisms.

Do they have a right to do this? And who do I see to take this further? Would the local education authority help, if needed?

[Beth2537]

So basically he is just being a normal 3 year old with normal 3 year old traits of behavior! ‘not listening’ is no way a reason for not being given the afternoon sessions. Boys will be boys and every child is different! Takes time to learn new rules and they need to allow him to experience an afternoon.

Not sure about who to contact etc.
Is there session availability? If they don’t accommodate your wishes and have negative comments towards your little boy definitely needs taking further.

[Beth2537]

Hopefully you can agree on a date to do afternoons?

[Srsly]

I would be asking specifically what they plan to do to try and integrate your son successfully. If they are suggesting he has behavior issues then what are they going to do to help him and what do they want you to do. He needs an action plan in place.

FWIW he sounds totally normal. I have an almost 4 year old. He is full time pre school, 9-3:30. He doesn't always listen. He has bad days, he has tantrums. But so do his friends. It's normal at 3.

Either they need to get realistic about their expectations or they aren't telling you the whole truth.

[AdventuringThroughLife]

They honestly sound like theyre just doing school a year early, rather than proper preschool education.

Are there other preschools or nursery schools you can choose instead... where they are perhaps better equipped to deal with actual 3 year olds!?

[pollygreen7]

It sounds like (very normal) behaviour the school should be able to handle. Before I took it any further I'd ask the teachers to come up with a plan to have you son begin, and have some ideas yourself how you will support them at home. My DS has also just started and got silly in the last 5 minutes of the day so while at home I set a number of listening 'challenges' when he was tired.

Are there other options for you? Your DS sounds very typical.