Nursery - not great start

[FunkyDisciple]

Hey mums. I'm actually a dad and hope you don't mind me posting here but really not sure where else I could get some help from.


My little boy started nursery last Wednesday. There were a lot of tears and when we went go pick him up he told me that night that when he wanted to go to the toilet in nursery the teacher yelled at him and said 'GO! Naughty!'. Now I don't know how credible a 3 year old tales are. Maybe he picked up what was said when the teacher was saying it to some other child I really don't know.

Wife is concerned. He always cries going to nursery and could be because he is scared of the teacher. It was his first time on wednesday last week and maybe he doesn't feel all that welcome. I was thinking I will speak to that teacher tomorrow but then I don't want her picking on my child or ignoring my child unnecessarily.

What do u mamas think I should do?

[dippyeggs]

This is a tricky one. If it wasn't for the 'Go! Naughty' tale which I agree has to be taken with a pinch on salt... I would say give it a few weeks - my dd (v nearly 3) has, bless her, changed nurseries twice and always cries for a few weeks as if her heart is broken - but crucially is happy on collection and wants to go when she wakes in the morning so I know it is just separation anxiety. You know your child. What's your gut feel? Is it his first time at nursery?

Perhaps ask what he has done that he enjoys and get him to engage in positive conversation about nursery?

Does he eat? That's always a good sign, however I once knew a child who cried for 2 years never ate never slept - nothing wrong with the nursery he just felt the separation so acutely...

Not sure if this helps. Hope so though.

[dippyeggs]

And I don't see why Dads can't post!

[FunkyDisciple]

Hi, thanks for the reply. Yes, it's my little boys first time in nursery and I also had a feeling it may have been separation anxiety too. I mean, I'm not child psychologist but my wife doesn't work, lady of leisure she is, and so we never had the need to send him nursery at aN earlier age or arrange a childminder. So he's always had family around him and going nursery for the first time was when he was surrounded by kids/peopl that were not family.

He did have a good day on Friday when teacher said 'not as many tears but played for most of the time' and he generally came out feeling quite happy to see me. I suppose it is just getting used to It but what he's telling me about the teacher, which is just one small incident, was enough to make wifey feel overprotective. Natural but understandable.

[mellowcat]

Could you or your wife stay with your little boy at nursery for a few sessions. Sometimes this is all it takes to build their (and your) confidence.