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This topic is for personal experiences or dilemmas; to debate the ethics of termination, please go here or here.

Having a termination but can't tell my boss

(20 Posts)
Ihavenobrain Mon 03-Nov-14 00:40:32

I cannot and will not tell my boss I need a day off because of an abortion.
I work term time only and need to give a good explanation as to why I have to take the day off.
I am the only person who works for her. She owns the company with her husband and I do some admin for them.
I need to unfortunately lie but do not know what I can say so that she can be understanding!
I don't feel able to say it's confidential to her because Iv placed my self in a position there, where by we are quite close and we tell each other so much.
I just want someone to come up with something that's believable.
Please don't judge or be nasty to mesad

Redglitter Mon 03-Nov-14 00:42:23

Can't you just phone in sick with a 24/48 hour bug. Best keeping it simple

McBee27 Mon 03-Nov-14 00:43:15

Hi OP. No judgement from me, been there, done that myself. Could you tell her it's for an operation, but not go into specifics? Would she press for details if she knows it's something medical?

DarceyBustle Mon 03-Nov-14 00:44:47

Could you say "It's gynaecological". Or "it's a specialist appointment I've been waiting for" or just "I need to take a day off. Something important has come up" with no explanation.

DorothyGherkins Mon 03-Nov-14 00:46:03

If you say its gynaecological, people dont usually press for more details.

Ihavenobrain Mon 03-Nov-14 00:46:24

what operation could I say?
Can do the bug thing.
Unfortunately I was actually ill a few weeks ago. She's so funny about time off.
Also rubbish at calling in sick and lying.
She would know I think. Sorryi do sound rubbish

Ihavenobrain Mon 03-Nov-14 00:46:41

* cant

Ihavenobrain Mon 03-Nov-14 00:48:26

Yes a gynaecologist appointment sounds good

DorothyGherkins Mon 03-Nov-14 00:59:11

There are so many different gynaecological procedures, (lucky us) your boss could have fun guessing and still be wrong! It could be fertility, endometriosis, polycystic ovaries etc etc etc - nah they wont question you!

basgetti Mon 03-Nov-14 01:04:31

Gynaecological procedure is a good idea, it shouldn't invite any prying. There are plenty to chose from, something like drainage of a bartholin's cyst which would just be a one off day procedure and wouldn't require you to invent ongoing health issues. Good luck.

AlpacaMyBags Mon 03-Nov-14 01:04:37

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

HerrenaHarridan Mon 03-Nov-14 01:06:42

Hi, I recommend sayinging it's a gynaecological investigation, it's quite invasive and requires anaesthetic so you'll be unfit for work for x time (give yourself time)

If you day this and she ever bring it up you can say it came back clear so you don't have to fake knowledge of a made up illness.

Take care of yourself x

basgetti Mon 03-Nov-14 01:06:47

Actually Alpaca's response is much better. It is a private matter and you shouldn't have to explain yourself in detail.

Purpleroxy Mon 03-Nov-14 01:08:03

I'd say it's for medical reasons and leave it at that.

Poseypops Mon 03-Nov-14 01:50:31

Hysteroscopy under general anaesthetic, for abnormal intermenstural bleeding. After you can say you had a polyp removed. If you are having a general anaesthetic you should consider taking the day after off too.

Ihavenobrain Mon 03-Nov-14 08:35:31

Oh thank you everyone. Thought I may get attacked but this is great smile

NoelleHawthorne Mon 03-Nov-14 08:41:24

i wouldn't give any reason

Just say ' its a minor op'

no need to be honest at all its nothing to do with her. She will think its a cyst or something

NanFucker Mon 03-Nov-14 09:46:13

Gynae or cyst sounds good.

Good luck op, difficult time for you thanks

Ihavenobrain Mon 03-Nov-14 11:19:47

Thank you all thanks

Ihavenobrain Mon 03-Nov-14 17:21:38

After all this I'm not pregnant!
I was totally convinced I was. Had all symptoms that I had with other dc.
Came on today grin
So releaved.

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