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Pregnancy

Feeling blue . . . .

9 replies

knackered76 · 02/07/2010 13:55

I'm 10 weeks today and apart from the tiredness feel fine. I have private scan later today so should feel excited but instead I just feel really blue.

I have a friend who had bad news at her 12 week yesterday, severe abnormality, and is now waiting to miscarry I had her over yesterday to help keep her mind off it and keep her child entertained. She has met someone today to discuss the results and although I haven't spoken to her I saw her this morning at the school drop off and after a brief chat it stuck me how awful it is for her. She had been TTC for 3 years and suffered 3 miscarriages. On top of that this pregnancy has been making her feel really rough and obviously that hasn't gone away because of the results yesterday.

Although I obviously want my pregnancy to be fine I am concerned about how she'll feel. We were due within a few days of each other. Sorry for this random blathering, just needed to talk to someone about it and she hasn't told anyone else about the pregnancy so have to do it online!

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japhrimel · 02/07/2010 14:04

Having been the friend having the miscarriage while a friend went on to have a healthy baby girl around my due date, I can say it probably will be tough.

But you shouldn't let that impact too much on you. It wouldn't make her feel any better if you had bad news too,so if she does find it tough (particularly when you get a noticeable bump!) just give her space and time and understanding.

Coming into close contact with the realities of miscarriage does make most people more nervous - it's harder to keep the rose tinted specs on. But enjoy your scan and hopefully all will be fine.

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knackered76 · 02/07/2010 14:21

Thanks Japhrimel. I think I feel so awful as it is the first time I have come into close contact with someone suffering a loss at 12 weeks and although she is being very pragmatic about it I can see how hard she is finding it.

Space, time and understanding . . .that I can do!

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Ryuk · 02/07/2010 14:32

I have a friend who is due in November, while I'm due in January. So far things are going ok for us both, but it has occurred to me how awful it would feel if one of us make it to term and the other doesn't. I'm afraid I can't give any better advice than japhrimel, just try to give her space and be supportive, and try to not worry too much. I hope you let us know how your scan goes!

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PixieCake · 02/07/2010 14:47

I also have a friend who miscarried recently. Things were slightly easier because I had already told them we were expecting too. But it was still very sad because one day we were talking on the phone about all the things we were going to do together on mat leave, and the next thing we had a call from her DH with the sad news.

I'm sorry to hear about your friends loss and it is totally understandable that you feel blue about it, both for her loss and for your own fears. The only thing you can do is let her know that you are there for her, and try not to be too sensitive if she doesn't want to see you for a bit. xx

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knackered76 · 02/07/2010 19:15

Well there's a twist I wasn't expecting. Went for my scan today and the baby stopped growing at 8 wks. Going for a d+c on tuesday and will bump into my friend there who is having a cvs! There are some unpleasant turns in life aren't there!

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