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Pregnancy

i really dont like dp when pg?

14 replies

muddle78 · 30/10/2009 17:09

is this a hormonal situation others also have? i like him when im not pg, been together 14 years. i dont think he changes toward me when im pg. dislike is possibly too gentle a description, honestly i verge on feeling hate towards him , i generally manage to hide these distructive emotions. anyone else have this?

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weavermum · 30/10/2009 17:25

i too have irrestible urge distance myself from dh will uptheduff. its hard too explain, we've been together 20 years and this only ever happens when pg (am pg with dc3). It does tend to go about 5 months when, ahem, start to find him completely irrestible in a different way. he then starts to distance himself from me. ho hum.

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muddle78 · 30/10/2009 17:32

thankyou weavermum. i so pleased im not alone in this. ive felt this way from day one and its just getting worse (33 weeks now)

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BellasYummyMummy · 30/10/2009 17:39

pleased to read this- i love my DH to bits but whenever im pregnant im very much 'this is my space and you're in it'. I feel bad as i go completely off sex and anything intimate. i love having him around and having hugs and stuff but i just switch off romantically...

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CantThinkofFunnyName · 30/10/2009 17:44

Muddle78 - I positively hate my DH most of the time when I'm pg. I feel resentful towards him during this pg (DC3) because he didn't have the snip when he said he would 7 years ago, even though I know that our little accident was as much my fault as his (!), he said he would stop smoking when we found out, as I did, and he still hasn't (reason to HATE even more) and even though, he buys me flowers every week and lots of my favourite chocolate, because he says I'm psychotic and he needs to do whatever he can to keep me happy , I still find his very breathing, annoying .

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muddle78 · 30/10/2009 18:21

cantthink thanks perhaps i should show my psychosis more and get flowers and chocolate!!!!!

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RustyBat · 30/10/2009 18:24

I didn't actually 'hate' DH, but I definitely went off him sexually almost as soon as I was pregnant - in fact with DD it was realising I suddenly felt totally turned off that made me first realise I was pg. It came back afterwards both times almost at once.

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muddle78 · 30/10/2009 18:29

bellas sorry i missed your post. i dont have to worry about intimacy as he just doesn't fancy me preggers.. i guess this doesn't help my feelings of resentment (perhaps if i hadn't been 33 weeks celibate i might not feel so frustrated and hateful)

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CantThinkofFunnyName · 30/10/2009 18:42

Ah - now with DC2, DH confessed he just didn't fancy pg women. I was certainly resentful, depressed and all sorts. This pg, I have to say, he has turned around on that front, but I just don't want to. Can't even kiss him goodnight because of the smell of smoke on his breath - urgh....

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prettyfly1 · 30/10/2009 19:33

me. Mine is admittedly being a txt at the mo but I am so resentful and bitchy about absolutely everything and actually made him move out half way through the pregnancy (for real reasons but still) as I just couldnt regulate my temper towards him at all. SO not like that normally,

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mollybob · 30/10/2009 22:19

I adore DH at the moment (pg 10 weeks) but only when he stays away - once he starts bothering me, talking to me and invading my space I have no time for him at all

I go all psycho and as soon as he sensibly moves away I miss him and want his company

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lola0109 · 30/10/2009 22:26

Oh, I am exactly the same! I just can't even bring myself to speak to him most nights, I just bark at him and then go to our room, door shut! He doesn't appear until I'm sleeping!

He jokingly says to DD "I think Mummy hates me" I have to stop myself saying that I do sometimes!!!

But I don't really, they are just obviously the easiest people to take things out on.

It should get better

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CantThinkofFunnyName · 31/10/2009 09:45

we are all just bitches aren't we

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Hollyoaks · 31/10/2009 09:50

I'm so pleased I've found this thread, this is my second dc and last time (apart from no sex) my feelings towards dh didn't change. However, this time I don't want him near me, I don't have any desire to cuddle, talk, do anything really and everything he does irritates me intensely. Glad I'm not the only on , I was panicking that this was a problem in our relationship rather than pregnancy-related even though it's a completely illogical feeling.

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CantThinkofFunnyName · 31/10/2009 10:02

Words of warning ladies - be v careful that you don't fall into trap of thinking it's all them and not you, and therefore a problem with your relationship. I did that with DC2 and it took us 6 years to get back on track. I totally believed he was a complete tw*t, which of course he is, but I just couldn't see the good. We got back on track and now are expecting DC3, so it starts again.... oh dear....

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