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pregnancy anxiety and depression

(16 Posts)
prettycat Sun 18-Oct-09 19:46:36

hi

I am 20 weeks pregnant and can't think because I'm so scared. Everything about being pregnant terrifies me and most days I don't wnat to get out of bed because the only place I feel safe is under a duvet.

What with everything about swine flu and the vaccine and I just don't know what to do. I can't concentrate at work and don't even want to go outside in case something terrible happens. It feels like my world's going to end.

does anyone else feel like this? what can I do?

BonjourIvresse Sun 18-Oct-09 20:37:10

You need to talk to your midwife about these feelings. She might be able to get your some counselling or talk through some of your concerns herself. There is a condition called pre-natal depression.

theperfectbaguette Sun 18-Oct-09 21:32:41

Prettycat
Anxiety is a terrible thing and can be absolutely destroying. It's important that you seek mediacl help with this as soon as possible, but be assured that you can absolutly get over this.

prettycat Mon 19-Oct-09 09:22:36

thanks

I nearly didn't go to work this morning. I was crying while getting dressed. I don't think I can do this.

how can they help me if I have this pre-natal depression? I can't take more pills with the baby

BonjourIvresse Mon 19-Oct-09 09:27:56

You can have counselling, and you can take some of the pressures out of your life. They can sign youoff ssick from work if necessary? Are you taking pregnancy multivits and fish oils? I used to find they helped with my mood whilst PG.

What are your concerns? is it anything specific or just a general feeling of sadness?

LadyoftheBathtub Mon 19-Oct-09 09:34:42

I'm pg and suffer a bit like this, though with me it's up and down so I have good times too and it's not this bad. Also it's my second pregnancy and I'm not as thrown by it as last time. But I do get very anxious. This sounds completely crazy but last time I actually found myself spending a considerable amount of time thinking it would be nice to go and live on another planet - yes planet, as if that were possible! - to get away from all the things I was worried about.

It's a time of huge change and your hormones make your feelings stronger, so normal worries can turn into something uncontrollable. I do agree that this sounds really bad for you and you could get a lot of help from midwife, GP etc and possibly some counselling.

Also remind yourself that this is a big change - your body is completely different - you are facing a big change in your life. And accept that that will churn you up, but you will come out the other side. It's OK to feel scared and overwhelmed, but you are still you underneath it all and you will get through it with help.

prettycat Mon 19-Oct-09 09:36:08

I take pregnacare, those are OK right?

I am scared of everything. I don't want my baby to be born into this world, it's all awful. Then I don't see the point in doing anything because nothing i do makes any difference.

BonjourIvresse Mon 19-Oct-09 11:27:15

Pregnacare is good. I think you should talk to your midwife /gp nd see if there is any other help they can offer? Do you enjoy goin to work, or would being signed off help?

prettycat Mon 19-Oct-09 11:53:56

I have a scan in 10 days I could talk to them then. It just seems like a long time.

My job is really really busy and there is always someone relying on me for something.

LuckyC Mon 19-Oct-09 12:26:46

prettycat I symphathise. Sounds tough. You are not alone though - I am in a very similar situation with prenatal depression and am having counselling. It is helping a lot.

If I can just be totally blunt, I think you should go and see your GP as soon as you can. Tell her exactly what you have said here and ask for counselling. Be determined and you will get help. Have you heard of CBT (cognitive behavioural therapy?) It's EXCELLENT for anxiety, it works fast and it's really effective for most people. You may also benefit from just some time and space to chat to a counsellor. But don't try and struggle on by yourself! Good luck!

prettycat Mon 19-Oct-09 15:13:29

thankyou LuckyC

I have talked to my GP before about my anxiety when i wasn't pregnant. He's really nice but I don't feel confident that anyone can help me.

I just feel like I want to run away from myself

LuckyC Mon 19-Oct-09 15:36:47

It sounds like you are having a really rough time! Is this your first baby?

It's exhausting having to deal with the demands of pregnancy and also feeling the way you do. Hormonal changes and general worry that all pregnant women have don't make it easier.

Keep talking to people - doesn't matter who, your parents, partner, friends, us MNers, we'll remind you that you are not alone!

I think it's brilliant that you have spoken to your GP before as they will remember and be more understanding when you speak to them again. Have you called them yet???

I know you say that you don't feel confident that anyone can help you but I promise you that you're wrong - you WILL get through this one way or another. And you are already helping yourself! Coming and talking about it on the boards is a really great start, talking to your GP is the next small step. Might not feel like it yet but you have already started on the way to feeling better. smile

theperfectbaguette Mon 19-Oct-09 22:33:09

LuckyC is right. Well done for putting your hand up and speaking up about this. It's compleatly natural for you to feel very frightened, thats the nature of depresion/anxiety, it's bloody scary.

Do you feel more confident talking to your midwife than your GP - if so speak to her, but quickly. Really dont put off making the call.

Good luck.

prettycat Tue 20-Oct-09 09:19:42

thankyou everybody again
you're all being so nice.

It is my first baby and what scares me most is sometimes I find myself wishing I wasn't pregnant at all right now because it's so terrifying.

Am I a bad person?

LittleOneMum Tue 20-Oct-09 09:28:02

Of course you are not. Bad people don't tend to think about things. You sound like a really caring woman where life has just got a bit too much.

BUT PLEASE get some help. Speak to your GP. If it's any consolation feeling anxious and out of your depth is totally common - I am expecting DC2 (who was fully planned) and I have spent the last week few things thinking 'god, what have I done?' but I know that it's just for a bit and will get better for me. I think you need soemone to talk to about how you are feeling. If nothing else, it might get it off your chest a little bit.

LuckyC Wed 21-Oct-09 10:01:02

I have found myself resenting the baby sometimes (very hard to admit, please don't tell anyone, poor little soul, not its fault!) because of the impact it's having on my life. But as littleonemum says, everyone has these 'God what have I done?' moments.

You are not a bad person. It's normal.

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