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Vivid waking nightmares in Pregnancy

(6 Posts)
valeriesparx Tue 14-Jul-20 05:50:30

Been trying a long while to conceive successfully and just about to hit 9 weeks pregnant.
I've miscarried before and other occasions been deeply unsupported in being able to continue with the pregnancy - at 37 I fee like this is my last roll of the dice so I feel beyond lucky to have got this far now.
The dreams/nightmares are pretty intense and I just wondered if anyone else, especially with what I term "fertility trauma" has experienced this.

Basically, I spend all night dreaming I'm bleeding - think the scene from The Shining. Those are at the nicer end of things in my unconscious brain. The stillbirth dreams are worse.
It's starting to take root in my waking brain and I'm checking for my period 4 or 5 times a day like my brain keeps going "and now here's your miscarriage".
I am starting to have dream like flashes that cut in to everyday tasks, probably because I am so tired but it's also kind of disruptive and scary.
My husband just keeps going "it's normal" he isn't worried since this is not his first baby at all-he's already got the perfect child.

Don't really feel I can talk to anyone else about it and genuinely scared if I say anything to a medical professional they'll make me terminate because it sounds pretty mental.

OP’s posts: |
jessstan2 Tue 14-Jul-20 06:22:58

No medical profession can make you terminate for any reason and you are not mental. People often have dreams like this at different times in their lives because they are stressed about something. They will stop of their own accord. The fact that you know you are dreaming is very positive, you will learn to divert the dreams to something innocuous.

It's quite natural that you are anxious at the moment. It might help to have some counselling with a therapist who understands this sort of thing.

You have my sympathy. I had a phase of similar many years ago, not due to pregnancy but very unpleasant all the same. They did stop and yours will.

Good luck and congratulations on your little bump.

CoalCraft Tue 14-Jul-20 06:24:17

Hi OP, didn't want to read and run, sorry you're going through this, it sounds awful.

First of all, rest assured that your dreams do not mean that something is wrong with baby, not will the dreams themselves harm baby; they're a psychological occurrence, not a physiological one, iyswim.

It's true that vivid dreams are a common pregnancy symptom, and so is a certain degree of anxiety, which can affect the content of dreams, so in that sense your husband is right, but it's not normal or okay for dreams to be so bad and so frequent that they regularly disturb your sleep and bleed into your daily life.

Are you registered with a midwife yet? If so, talk to them or your GP, and do not let them minimise what you're experiencing. They'll be able to recommend something for you, whether medication or therapy.

WatchingFromTheWings Tue 14-Jul-20 06:32:35

I had horrid dreams throughout my first pregnancy. No fertility issues but I miscarried earlier the same year. I was dreaming I was bleeding too, not as bad as your dreams though. I too would check constantly that I wasn't bleeding, going back and forth to the loo 2 or 3 times a night.

The further on through the pregnancy I got the 'safer' I felt and the dreams did ease up, you may find the same. Though I was still checking for bleeding regularly. I was often waking at 2am to check. 20 years on I still wake at 2am!

mongoosebaby Tue 14-Jul-20 09:08:01

I'm also pregnant, and having bonkers dreams. They aren't about the baby (and there has been no infertility issues with us) but they are incredibly vivid and real feeling. My sleep is horrendous because of them! Try not to worry, I believe it's hormonal.

Mc3209 Tue 14-Jul-20 09:39:26

Every night if this pregnancy I am having completely off the wall, realistic, weird dreams. Themes vary wildly, however I find if I am worried about something during the waking hours it will be reflected in my dreams. The latest example was breastfeeding, had a dream that baby was trying to latch on and nipples just cracked up (like the dry earth in the dramatic desert images) with blood gushing out everywhere. And those bonkers dreams are not limited to baby/pregnancy theme either. I haven't had a single night of dreamless deep sleep this pregnancy (24 weeks currently).
You are definitely not mental, it's the joy of pregnancy hormones. I wish I could say it goes away, but mine still haven't. I've learned to breathe a sigh of relief when I wake up and try to forget them.

There is a very helpful thread on here 'pregnancy after loss, dreaming of rainbows' (or something similar) girls on there are amazing, have a look, maybe it will help to ease your daytime anxiety a little (I know it's a lot easier to say...)

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