how do you go about telling people you are expecting baby no3?

[FillydoraTonks]

We have told a few people and they have been utterly, utterly, scandilised.

a few more have been "how will you cope "



am wondering about just NOT telling people and waiting til they notice but fear that this will cause offence.

thoughts? Its a tricky subject to broach, really, i feel. "hey, guess what, I've messed up AGAIN!"

[FillydoraTonks]

(am not sure what "scandilised" means, btw but by word it doesn't sound nice)

[Crazydazy]

You must be mad woman

[ConnorTraceptive]

haven't figured out how to tell people about number two yet

[nellie75]

Why do you feel you've messed up? I've got three dc and would love four, have always loved children and used to want eight though gone off that idea due to cost!!

[ChudleyMintonCanons]

Will your DC be close together in age? Mine are - i suspect people were scandalized judging by the reactions (I like to think they were jealous of all the post-natal ...ahem...sex). Congratulations BTW

[FillydoraTonks]

oh this wasn't planned...again. its life

they are not massively close together. ds and dd are 22 months apart and dd and db will be 2.5 years apart. Which does seem like a luxuriously large gap tbh.

[nellie75]

well planned or otherwise congratulations and three are good fun in my opinion, mine are all five years apart - eldest is ten youngest 19 weeks.

[3madboys]

well i am expecting no 4 and havent told family yet cos i know they will be

my mum especially will be negative, when i told her i was preg with ds3, she said " oh no not again"

dp and i always wanted 4 tho so we are happy and thats what counts

[makemineadouble]

I think it's lovely as long as your pleased? I have 3 24-21-15 love them and hate them each and everyday ha ha did notice that number 3 was different I watched everything, movement, word, expression
still do??? how strange??? maybe I think, because I really knew I would'nt have any more... enjoy good luck

[FillydoraTonks]

you are all most kind

but how do I slip it into conversation with people?

[DarrellRivers]

Well I think it's lovely news and i am here
Life is full of lovely suprises like yours
Don't tell anyone until they notice

[LilyLoo]

it's weird isn't it. I expeting no.3 and this one has been the hardest to tell people about, but don't know why. Congrats to you it will be wonderful.

[zookeeper]

don't know but prepae yourself for the "was it an accident" conversations. Complete strangers will say it without embarrassment

[FillydoraTonks]

lol

yes i am strangely reluctant to tell people

its so OBVIOUSLY a screw up (I mean, i spent the entire time since dd 's birth saying NO MORE EVER AGAIN)

[FillydoraTonks]

"was it an accident" always makes me pmsl

I want to say "yes, it was, i fell and hit my head and next thing I knew..."

[DarrellRivers]

Tell everyone you had been planning it and everything you had said was a smokescreen to put them off the track.

[nellie75]

The only person i was bothered about telling was my mum but thats because she has my dc when i'm at work anyway after an initial oh god i'm getting too old for all this,(her not me, lol) she was so happy she was even present at my home birth

[DarrellRivers]

Yes, I reckon look down at your stomach and go
'Lordy, How on earth did that happen?'

[NeverTickleASleepingSoupDragon]

Pre-empt it by saying "Hey, guess what! We decided to have a third child and it's due in...!"

I said after DS1 that I would never ever have another. And after DS2. Both DS2 and BabyDragon were planned though...

[zookeeper]

congratulations though - my little third dd is a joy - can't imagine life without her

[IsabelWatchingItRainInMacondo]

How do you tell the other people?, my only suggestion is DON'T apologise while telling them as if you had done something wrong.

Your baby, your well thought choice, even if an accident, none of their business. (and it saves you from offending other people who, like me, are part of a group of 3 siblings!).

The response to any person asking "how will/do you cope?" is the same as if they were asking about your job, the political situation or the English weather... you just cope. Period.

[Bibis]

Well done you, I think it is great news, I have 4 and you will get negative reactions but it is a celebration ignore the detractors and enjoy your family

[FillydoraTonks]

its the slightly gossipy, prurient "how will you cope " that does my head in

i struggle to think of an answer aside from "oh feck off"

[zookeeper]

Actually "oh feck off" is perfect.

Dare you

[zookeeper]

or just say breezily "I don't know but at least I won't have time to have sex again"