Pregnancy worry

[lemur2009]

Hi

I am on my first pregnancy after 2 ectopic pregnancies which both required surgery and Ivf. I am so lucky and happy but I can't stop worrying that something is going to go wrong. I am 17 weeks and I felt more comfortable when I had all the symptoms in the first 3 months. Not that they are gone I have a constant worry that baby is no longer there or something is wrong.
I tried to talk about this will my midwife on my last appointment bit she dismissed me and told "I needed to get over it"and then told me I was too fat (Ivery put on the average weight for my time of pregnancy). I'm worried but all people seem to say is don't worry. Any advice

[HelloMist]

Perhaps consider asking if you could change midwife, as that doesn't sound very helpful or caring advice from yours! After IVF and ectopics it is understandable that you are very anxious.

Has your baby started kicking yet? It might start to in the next few weeks. Perhaps that will be something to make it feel more real and show you baby is alive and well. :) I'm not sure I had many other symptoms at that stage. There will also be a scan around 20 weeks?

Does your midwife let you listen to the heartbeat at appointments?

[lemur2009]

My midwife didn't offer us a heartbeat listen or anything. We are getting a 20 weeks scan.
I just feel like my midwife has made me more nervous than I was before

[Popskipiekin]

Congratulations on your pregnancy lemur! As pp said, please ask to change midwife, or, if you see a different one each appointment, request not to see her again - she does not sound remotely caring, helpful or professional. She should know your history and be trying to be particularly supportive in your case! Too many women put up with poor antenatal care. Please do this for yourself, it will make you feel much better.
I completely understand worrying the baby is no longer there once 1st trimester symptoms go but once kicks start you should be fine. Again, if you're having bad anxiety about this, I would see about making a small fuss and seeing whether you can get extra scans based on your history. Worth a shot. Good luck.

[HelloMist]

I didn't get on with my midwife and did change! It felt a little awkward when the first one reappeared for one appointment but I didn't regret it. I can't remember how often or what stages but I did get to hear the heartbeat at several appointments with both of them. You could also see your GP if only for a chat. They should be sympathetic and might help reassure you a little.

[Babyboo1974]

Hi all I'm about five weeks pregnant and had spotting for the last week been to epu they have been checking my hormone levels and cause they are not doubling they are concerned but had two scans which showed a small sac last week and yesterday it had grown but last nite after going to the toilet I had quite abit of pinky mucas discharge on the tissue booked in for another scan next week I'm so scared x

[Barefootcontessa84]

Hi OP - I'm in a similar situation and it really does feel like limbo at the moment. Try and relax and assume everything is fine - the overwhelming odds are that it is.

Babyboo this is someone else's thread and you may find you do better with responses/support if you start your own.

[Babyboo1974]

I'm new on here how do I start my own thread??

[lemur2009]

You have all made me feel so much better.I definitely don't want her again so have got a number to complain. I have also booked in for a reassurance scan at local scanning place.i think it will be worth doing just to settle my mind

[HelloMist]

Lemur - I'm glad we've helped you! I hope the phone call goes well, and good idea to book reassurance scan. x

Babyboo: choose the appropriate topic (Pregnancy) then click "Add new thread to this topic" that's in blue above all the threads. Or on the mobile version there's a plus sign that says "add post" at the bottom of the page.