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Pregnancy

Is my OH being too laid back??

24 replies

LouLou030783 · 22/12/2015 19:40

So said to him today after Xmas we will need to go look at prams so we can get it ordered etc and he's like can't we just order online I said no want to see it..bonus side is I get to pick it haha cause I really don't think he's up for pram shopping, he's just being so laid back about everything that I'm prog gonna get left to arrange everything for the baby which in a way suits cause I get to pick everything, please tell me he's not the only OH like this

OP posts:

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3rdrockfromthesun · 22/12/2015 19:45

Different people do things differently but I think men are very good at letting women do everything. Just get in the car one day and say you want to go shopping

seven201 · 22/12/2015 20:29

It's too early for us to do things like this as I'm only 14 weeks but I can imagine my husband not getting involved. That doesn't make him a shit, but he hates shopping and he hates making decisions. I like picking things so it works well! I'll probably check big purchases by him. How many weeks are you? We bought our first baby thing today, a little sleep suit, was really fun!

LouLou030783 · 22/12/2015 20:44

Seven I'm only just coming up 14 weeks but purchasing big things ie pram I'm hoping to start when bout 18/20 weeks so Jan/Feb just so I can be mega organised, I'll panic otherwise lol. I haven't purchased even a sleep suit yet and I know I've ages to go but with 2 other kids I wanna just be organised.

3rd rock that's a brill idea x

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sepa · 22/12/2015 20:49

OH was pretty rubbish up until 26 weeks after I had decorated the nursery he then got involved doing bits for that. All purchases I have made the decisions and only minor input from him.
Just ask what he wants to be involved in, talk budget for bits he doesn't and shop away!

LouLou030783 · 22/12/2015 21:10

Sepa I think that's what I shall be doing although no doubt whatever I spend he will be like how much I don't think he realises quite how expensive babies are x

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princesspineapple · 22/12/2015 21:19

I'm 28 weeks and we have 1 sleepsuit and a changing bag!
OH is a one big shopping trip kind of person... So we're basically planning to do it all in one day rather than get bits now and again. He comes across really uninterested when we're out and I point out baby shoes and things... But I'm sure he'll care when we actually have our shopping day :)

fluffypenguinbelly · 22/12/2015 21:25

I am 27 weeks and I have done nothing.

The first time round I was about 36 weeks when we bought the plan and a few sleep suits. I didn't feel particularly stressed about it. Went 9 days overdue so was well organised with plenty of time to spare!

fluffypenguinbelly · 22/12/2015 21:26

pram

LouLou030783 · 22/12/2015 22:07

God maybe everyone I know that's preg is far too organised and in actually fact I have no reason to stress lol, u all sound like u have if under control pretty late on in pregnancy X

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Everythinggettingbigger · 22/12/2015 22:24

With DS1 I ordered my pram pretty much straight away after 12 week scan but that was to give plenty of time to pay for it! OH was interested in some things but majorly uninterested in others. Annoyingly for some things I would have preferred him to be uninterested and vice versa!

fluffypenguinbelly · 22/12/2015 22:47

Nothing wrong with being excited and preparing. I have always done everything last minute, it's just how I work! Always been a bit of a pessimist too.

I bet you've wrapped all your xmas presents. I haven't even finished buying them!

mmmuffins · 22/12/2015 22:50

Some of us are just chilled. I was given some hand-me-down clothes and then bought the absolute bare minimum remaining stuff at 32 weeks. Am now waiting until after the baby arrives to see if I actually want a pram, etc. The shops are always there.

jamtartandcustard · 23/12/2015 01:34

Dh and I have been the complete opposite. He was looking up baby bits before the first scan, trying to find the best price and get organised. I didn't buy anything until I started maternity leave.

LouLou030783 · 23/12/2015 06:24

Suppose everyone is different X everyone I know had pram ordered by 20 weeks X mind u I haven't even bought a sleep suit yet keep going to then thinking Na it can wait x

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maybebabybee · 23/12/2015 06:35

29 weeks here and we have practically nothing...

sepa · 23/12/2015 08:01

I didn't buy anything till after my 20 week scan. Only reason I have a Pram is because mumma was buying it for us! I say you have a while yet. Look into prices now and then see what the same items are priced at after Christmas in the sales

Kaytee1987 · 23/12/2015 08:24

I think a lot if guys tend to be a bit more laid back. I said to DH the other night 'I will really need your help choosing a car seat & pram as there's lots of instructions and guidance for these things and I think you will be best at seeing how they work'. So he now knows he's needed to choose these things and I can't do it without him. A lot of men maybe feel left out of all things baby.

Kaytee1987 · 23/12/2015 08:25

That being said I will wait until 20 weeks so I can find out sex incase it helps us to decide on stuff.

QforCucumber · 23/12/2015 08:28

29 weeks today and have a moses basket and a multi pack of vest suit thingys.

Pram I've seen, will order in Jan sales (waiting to see if I can get something knocked off for it)

DP is like yours, I'll show him something and he seems quite disinterested - but then he's the same with things I buy for myself too, he just doesn't get excited over 'stuff'

Iammad · 23/12/2015 09:13

I had everything by 30 weeks, wanted to as baby due any time (36 weeks) but my others have come between 35-38 weeks and seeing that it's Christmas I am no way prepared to get stuff now!
Even the Christmas presents were all done early.
I just like being prepared, my household needs it with 5 other children one who is autistic.
Husband when's working flat out as well.
Some people are more laid back and that is also fine, everyone is different.

Iammad · 23/12/2015 09:14

Who*

SleepyRoo · 23/12/2015 15:19

He might feel like it's not really "real" to him yet, at 14 weeks. Once you've had the 21w scan, and the bump is really showing, you might see a slight change in his attitude re preparation . It can be hard for dads to empathise 100 per cent if time as theyre just not experiencing all the mad symptoms we do. Personally I find the OTT dads who talk about "our" pregnancy & who probably ordered the pram in their choice of colour, a bit

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brookeberry · 23/12/2015 16:56

My DH is jumping up and down with excitement over our baby, but he's not interested in pram shopping. That's fine with me as my mum is dying to do it with me I'm 24 weeks and have today bought something for the baby. I'm doing tons of research though!

brookeberry · 23/12/2015 16:57

'only today' !

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