early pregnancy, doctors being unhelpful.

[sb1134]

Hi really new to all this and wondered if anyone could help. I have found out I am five weeks pregnant. Went to the doctors yesterday and she seemed unhelpful. She has referred me to the hospital at 12weeks but that's all.

I had a mc last year and was probably looking for a bit more support from the doctors.

I suffer really bad with anxiety, currently on no tablets trying to stay strong but can't stop worrying something bad will happen again.
I have been getting stomach cramps but is that normal?
is it normal not to be seen until 12 weeks?
I do have a epu close by and wondered if I should go there? Or should I ring doctors again
Thanks for your help

[YouAreMyBread]

I would have thought you'd be sent for a booking in appointment straight away as you have a scan at 12 weeks. Can you ring the midwives yourself and get booked in?

[sb1134]

Do you think I should ring the doctors today and see if I could get booked in with the mw. It did seem odd waiting until 12 weeks.

[TeenageMutantNinjaTurtle]

Some hospitals do the booking in appt at the same time as the 12wk scan so this isn't totally unusual and there isn't really anything else the GP would do at this point. Did you tell the doctor you wanted more support? In your position I'd probably go back the the gp to talk specifically about your anxiety. Congrats on your pregnancy

[TeenageMutantNinjaTurtle]

Oh and generally you can't self refer to the EPU, your gp would need to do that. And in the most gentle way possible, there is no reason to refer you. Stomach cramps are normal and it's usually only if you had bleeding that you'd get referred despite a precious miscarriage.

The chances are that your baby is totally ok. But you do sound extremely anxious and it's worth trying to get some help managing that.

[TeenageMutantNinjaTurtle]

Sorry, that was supposed to say "previous miscarriage" rather than precious. But I imagine it was precious as well. Sorry again for the awkward typo.

[sb1134]

Thanks for your reply. I'll probably wait for the appointment letter to come through.
I don't have any obvious problem signs so I probably need to relax and enjoy it.
I mentioned it to my cbt councillor so she is going to go over some coping mechanisms I can use and relaxation.
Thanks again for your reply

[SophieBarringtonWard]

I think it varies, both places I've had children you can self refer to EPU.

I think waiting till 12 weeks sounds normal, from a pregnancy point of view, but it might be worth seeking more support for your anxiety?

[SophieBarringtonWard]

X post - that sounds good.

[WhyOWhyWouldYou]

Its completely normal to be wait until 12week scan for booking in some areas. Drs don't do anything else but refer. - does feel a bit crap when you want support though.

Cramps can be a completely normal part of pregnancy, but if your worried and your far enough along then you could call epu for early scan.

[sb1134]

The epu close to me you can just go. I spent a lot of time there last year.

Currently it is only cramping, so probably just normal.
I will probably ask drs for some support for my anxiety just so it keeps under control.
12weeks feels so far away... :-D

[27mummmy2boys]

You can request a reassurance scan but you have to be at least 7 weeks I got told. I always rang epu myself direct. I've got 3 children but had multiple miscarriages to be honest if you feel it's affecting your well being you could aways ask for a reassurance scan just to put mind at ease. If your not having any pains or bleeding I would just try and relax and be as positive as you can xx

[27mummmy2boys]

Sorry my phone took so long to refresh new comments xx

[Only1scoop]

Yes normal....I'd wait until about 7 weeks and have a private scan you should be able to see heartbeat by then....

Hope all good it's horrible worrying.

[Only1scoop]

Yes normal....I'd wait until about 7 weeks and have a private scan you should be able to see heartbeat by then....

Hope all good it's horrible worrying.

[Clarabell33]

I self-referred to the EPU for this pregnancy - mostly because I couldn't even get a doctor's appt for another 6 weeks, even after explaining circumstances - MMC at 11.5wks a few months previously (which my GP had been great with re support etc).

I didn't want to wait so long to see anyone at all as I needed reassurance after my late MMC so called the local midwife team to arrange a booking appt, but the lady I spoke to refused to set this up for any earlier than my 12th week of pregnancy, and said the midwife would then arrange my first scan - by which point it might well have been too late for nuchal translucency testing. I didn't really want to wait until my second trimester to find out if things were ok or not!

I then called the EPU, spoke to a couple of absolutely lovely midwives and got booked in for an early scan in my 8th week. After that, I called the midwife team again and as it turned out I was a bit further along, the lady I spoke to this time rescheduled my booking appt for a couple of weeks earlier and also booked in my 12wk scan for my actual 12th week.

So I'd definitely call your local EPU. Good luck

[TinyMonkey]

When I found out I was pregnant again after a mmc last summer my gp was kind enough to refer me to the epu for an early scan at 7+4 as I was anxious. I think I was extremely lucky to have seen the gp I did, as I suspect most other gps wouldn't have bothered. I am in London though, so I could've just rocked up at UCLH epu without a referral, which is what I had done with my first pregnancy.

I'll be honest though, even with an early scan, I was only reassured for a day or so before I started fretting again - all the way to my scan at 13 weeks, and then all the way to my 20 week scan, and beyond.

At some point you just have to put your faith in your body and keep your fingers crossed, in the early days there is very little you can do to ensure that the pregnancy stays put or doesn't. Working with your counsellor on coping mechanisms sounds like the best possible plan, particularly because the stress doesn't magically disappear at 12 weeks!

I really hope it all works out well for you.

[juneavrile]

Really agree with PP. It will be better for you if you learn to cope with the anxiety and look for ways of relaxing and enjoying the pregnancy if you can. There are huge gaps between appointments and scans - even for some high riskers. If you can afford a few private scans, great, but they only tell you so much and last for a few days.
While it would be great if the EPU could fit everyone in for reassurance, you probably know yourself that miscarriage is all too common and so they simply can't see everyone all of the time and I'm sure most of us would make way for the women who are in really urgent need.
Check that booking in in your area is at 12 not 8 weeks and see what your cbt practioner can do.

[sb1134]

thanks everyone!

[SummerMeadow33]

PS. Drinking lots of water can help with the cramps. Had them too. Am now 10 weeks approx. (my dates are super confused) and looking forward to meeting midwife end of this week, not least for dating scan!

[mutternutter]

Hi op. I fell off a large horse whilst pregnant. Now have a year seven. So good luck. Dreams do come true

[Annarose2014]

This happened to me - confirmed at GPs at 5 weeks, then had a loooong wait to my 12 week scan. Those are hard weeks! A lot of people have private scans cos they can't handle the wait. I was on the verge of booking one every week but since I had terrible nausea from 6 weeks on I figured I was still pregnant so I never got around to it. As they say if you feel pregnant then you are pregnant!

Cramping is fairly normal unfortunately. Very nerve wracking but even spotting isn't necessarily unusual. Just more to add to the stress!

I do know that there are certain anti-anxiety meds and anti-depressants that are safe to use in pregnancy. And there are ante-natal psych services for people who are really struggling with their mental health. You can ask the EPU how you get referred. Don't discount this avenue as pregnancy is so stressful and so looooooong!