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Pregnancy

Feeling very lonely

4 replies

Mummycherry2 · 18/02/2014 00:42

I'm 29 weeks now and really struggling. First pregnancy and I feel so scared and lonely. Everytime I say to husband, mums or friends I get laughed at and made to feel stupid. I feel huge and so uncomfortable and I all I keep getting told is that it's going to get worse. Is it normal to love your baby but want your baby back? I'm so so tired and so feel so alone.

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Bankholidaybaby · 18/02/2014 02:15

You're nearly there - it might feel like ages, but it'll come soon enough. I don't think you'll know quite how you feel about your body for a while but it's perfectly natural and understandable to want it back the way it was. You may find you don't mind so much when you meet the tiny person responsible for the changes!

What's making you feel lonely? Do you have any pregnant/new mother friends who might share in some of your feelings? It sounds like your husband and mother might not appreciate how deeply concerned you are. Perhaps, if you speak to other mothers-to-be, you'll find they have the same worries. I was very bothered about losing my waist and breasts, but if there is any significant difference between what they looked like before pregnancy and what they look like now, I'm not able to see it. I'm a bit plumper than I'd like, but that's because I eat too many biscuits much at the moment.

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Inglori0us · 18/02/2014 05:56

Sorry you're feeling low. It's a difficult time. I'm 32 wks and really uncomfortable too! I found last time that it's such a physical relief to have the baby and the end the stress pregnancy puts in your body, you feel instantly a lot better after the birth.
I won't lie, I hated my body for a while after as my Mat clothes were too big and my normal clothes too small so I had to buy stuff in bigger sizes which was demoralising.
Within 8 months my body was pretty much back to normal without much severe dieting. It takes time and you need to be kind to yourself and enjoy your baby for those first few months.
Is there any local Bumps & Babies groups you can visit towards the end of your pregnancy to meet people? Or are you doing NCT? It's pricey but really good to have a local network of people in the same boat. The Nhs also offer ante natal classes.
Hormones are crazy so it's on to feel a bit up and down or overwhelmed. Try to de-stress a bit by having a massage or trying a pregnancy yoga class. Do some nice pampering things if you can.
Take care.

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Mummycherry2 · 19/02/2014 03:46

Thank you both for your kind words, I met up with a friend today who is also pg with first baby and she completely understood so I'm feeling a little more relieved now!

I will see about an antenatal group because I think you are both right that it will help. Thank you so much for your kindness and advice x

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icklekid · 19/02/2014 07:16

So glad you found someone understanding to talk to, good luck finding an antenatal group and hope that it just keeps getting better. I'm in a lot of pain at 20 weeks so totally relate to feelings of frustration with your body and can only imagine how I will be feeling by the time I get to 30...

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