Getting ready for birth - when to do what?

[Cherrybug]

Due date is in 4 weeks and I am having a complete personal disaster in that we had a recent house fire and so are homeless, living with in laws and have no idea when we'll get back home though very likely not in time for baby arriving

Anyway because of this we've been totally preoccupied, upset etc and I havent been thinking at all about preparing for birth or baby. With my DD I did prenatal hypno, perineal massage, raspberry leaf tea - the lot but I can't remember when I should start doing things.

Can anyone give a kind of timeline to what I need to be doing? I haven't even got the things to pack in my bag yet, never mind have my bag packed.

Thanks - my brain just isnt working properly due to all the stress we're under so any advice gratefully received!

[Mouseketool]

Gosh you poor thing!

I can't really remember as DS1 was 4 years ago so hopefully someone with up to date info will be along soon, but I seem to recall with the raspberry leaf teas it's 3 weeks before due date, and I should think the perineal massage a bit longer eg: start about now

[Cherrybug]

Anyone? Should I post this in childbirth?

[Mum2be79]

perineal massage is from 34 weeks. Raspberry leaf tea, I think, is from 37/38 weeks. Don't know about prenatal hyno.

Sorry to here of your house fire. Hope everything goes well for you.

[idlevice]

None of those things are compulsory. I should think the majority of people don't do them. A second birth is almost always easier so if you already have a lot on your plate why not just go with the flow & don't put the pressure on yourself to do or even think about extra stuff? Treat yourself to a massage or pedicure instead, or something that gives you a chance to just relax before the big event. ( Unless you are the sort of person that would find it more stressful not to do those preparation things IYSWIM)

[MrsSSB]

Oh you poor thing...but do try to take it easy, you've got lots going on and adding things to your ToDo list isn't goingto make u feel better...
I'm sure things will be fine..just get ready slowly with t essentials..

Sorry haven't got much other info to share re perineal massage, I'm 36w and been putting it off..heard u should start about 34w...but I'm scared of making Jelly come early!!

[Cherrybug]

Thanks all - probably right I should try to relax a bit and not add things to worry about. My DD's birth was great despite being induced and I did all those things then so I have some faith in them making a difference. The one thing I'm really worried about is a difficult birth which I'll have to recover from in someone elses house.

Anyway have got some raspberry leaf tea so will start drinking that next week at least.

[Tigerinmysoup]

Sorry to hear you're having a tough time. You're due around the same time as me and I can't imagine how you must be finding it, but I hope all goes well for you.
I agree with the previous posters that say just to relax (or try to anyway). I did hypno with my first birth too, and started doing the CD again at about 32 weeks (although admittedly I don't find time to do it every day). Do you still have a copy of the hypno CD that you can use? If not, you could just try and take some time out every day to do the deep breathing and relaxing to some music that calms you down.
I think most people start perineal massage at about 36 weeks. Tbh I haven't bothered so far (I did it last time and still ended up with a 2nd degree tear despite the water birth ). And the raspberry leaf tea is at about 37 weeks.
Did you use a birthing ball much last time? Might be worth getting one if you haven't already, and do some bouncing/wiggling on it to get baby in a good position.
But most of all, try not to stress too much about it.