DD started party training at 2 years and 2 months. She was showing signs for months - asking to go to the toilet, pulling down her nappy and sitting on the loo (although not doing anything). So we got potties and training seats for the loo - upstairs and downstairs plus the same for DGM's house and lots of knickers!
The potty training was going well. She would use it on command and sometimes of her own free will. She responded to praise (clap, well done, big song and dance and sometimes a lolly) and accidents were on occasions - not every day and usually when she was engaged in play. She would even sometimes get a bit teary with it dribbling down her legs. However, she has not ever and will not do a poo on the potty or toilet.
The poo situation has become a bit tricky and I have no idea how to progress this. My HV said to allow her to do what she wants (poo in a nappy or knickers), change her but don't speak to her. DD hides, so she knows what she is doing, tells us to go away and 'does it' - nappy OR knickers. She will even refuse to be cleaned and sometimes we've not known if she's outside/inside playing and I'm busy and she's quite happy to 'sit' in it!!! I've tried taking her to the potty/toilet but she 'tantrums' and by the time I get her there, she's done it. I've asked where we do our poos and she tells us 'potty', so she knows where to do it. I wouldn't mind so much about the poo if it was once a day, but she's not a 'once a day' person - she can go up to 5 times! That's 5 pairs of knickers ruined. Sometimes they can simply be washed and other times, they are non salvageable. When we are out and about, she wears a nappy because we can't guarantee that we near a toilet and of course there's the poo ...
So I don't know what to do.
- Do I continue with the HV's advice - knickers, let her poo, change her and not speak when changing her?
- Go back to nappies? try again in a few months.
- Hurriedly carry her to a toilet to do her poo?
I've no idea for the best! DS had poo issues at aged 2. He held onto it. It was caused by nasty comments from DGP's (not meaning to be malicious - simply different generation thing) and we struggled on occasions going through phases of soiling himself, holding on, movicol and now aged 5 he only goes once every 2 weeks due to 'elongation of the colon'.
Clearly I messed up with him and I don't want to mess up again.