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Is your child ready for potty training at nursery? Here's the place for all your toilet training questions.

Potty training

Almost 3yr old boy won't sit on toilet

15 replies

Shoegal5 · 05/01/2016 21:34

Hi this is my first post so here goes... My lo is 3 end of January and after x2 failed attempts at potty/ toilet training, I am thinking of trying again after his bday! He had displayed all the signs of readiness ( physically) but whenever I suggest even sitting on the toilet now he is not interested and puts up resistence! He even freaks out when I change his nappy demanding a new nappy be put on straight away. The last time I tried was Halloween so thought 3 full months would be enough of a gap?!?! He's very switched on and wilful any suggestions?

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HarrysMummy17 · 09/01/2016 23:24

No helpful suggestions I'm afraid but watching with interest as I have a similar issue.

Ds is 3 in March and won't sit on potty or toilet. Shows no interest in either?!

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whatsoever · 10/01/2016 00:44

Keep trying different things (different potties/toilet seats etc) is my only suggestion. My DS (3y3m) has been potty trained for wees since the month before he was 3 but will still only use a potty and won't entertain the idea of a normal toilet even with a toddler seat. (I won't mention the poo situation...)

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Shoegal5 · 10/01/2016 07:39

Thanks for the replies I hate to say it but I've probably spent over £100 on potty products already! Thomas , cars , various seats for the toilet! For over a month I have been doing all nappy changes in the toilet to get him used to being in there but doesn't seem to be making any difference! I mentioned the toilet yesterday & he got quite upset. He is obsessed with Spitfires so have put a picture in the toilet of one too !!!! Don't want to push him over the edge but he's clearly ready and just refusing to even try ! Feeling lost

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ipswichwitch · 10/01/2016 07:55

We had this with DS1. Was clearly ready for potty training but got quite upset at the idea of sitting on a toilet. Wouldn't even sit on his potty in the bathroom. So I put a big oilcloth on the sitting room floor and potty on top, stuck his favourite cartoon on and let him just sit and watch, which he was quite happy to do.

Once he got the hang of it (really didn't take long at all) I moved the potty to the bathroom and he was fine with that. Wouldn't use a toilet for a few months, so I got a travel potty to use in the toilets when we were out and about. I would just suggest he uses the toilet each time but not push it if he said no.

Eventually he decided he wanted to be "a big boy" and go on the toilet (thinking back in sure he was scared of falling in!). Now at 4.3yo he will even wee standing up with no problem.

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Bringiton2016 · 10/01/2016 08:04

Does he see other children going? My ds wouldn't go on the toilet until he started preschool and saw the other kids going. I think it helped that they were small toilets too. Peer pressure definitely worked.

Dd was scared of the potty, and I know it's contrary to advice, but we have frog marched her to it and made her sit there and she's been fine on it. It's like she had a massive phobia that needed cracking. Not nice, but she was adamant she wouldn't wear nappies.

I wouldn't put the nappy on him, even if he asks. I'd leave him to it. It's alarming for them to see their wee and poo coming out of them, but they need to get over it!!!

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SauvignonPlonker · 10/01/2016 08:49

My DS didn't use a potty & went straight to the toilet. He used a step & peed in the toilet, just like daddy. I also used a special seat which sat on the toilet seat. Maybe skipping the potty stage would help?

Have you ready "potty training for boys?" I found it quite helpful & it was only a few £'s from Amazon.

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millymae · 10/01/2016 09:09

Have you tried bribing him? I know this is generally frowned upon but it definitely worked for dd2. She refused point blank to sit on the potty or the toilet and if I left her without a nappy she was able to hold on for long enough to make me worried that she would burst and give in to her requests for a nappy.

She was 2 years 9 months when her brother was born and I was so desperate to get her out of nappies that I resorted to bribery. I left her nappy off and when she asked for one I said that if she sat on the toilet I would give her some chocolate buttons. She was in the bathroom like a shot, sat on the toilet without complaint and ate what she had been given in double quick time. When she asked for more I simply said that she could have the rest of the packet as soon as she did a wee. The floodgates opened,
she got her chocolate and lots of praise and she never wore a daytime nappy again. Nighttime nappies were dispensed with soon after.

I am sure the chocolate helped in the process, but one of my friends pointed out that the fact she could see at first hand that nappies were for tiny babies also contributed. The thing that surprised me most was that she never asked for sweets on the toilet again.

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Shoegal5 · 16/01/2016 20:55

So after putting food colouring down the toilet and a ping pong ball with a smiley face on it I got him quite interested in the toilet! Miraculously on Thursday he was at a toddler group and saw that one of his friends is now toilet trained and when I went to change he nappy he demanded he didn't want it! Sat on the toilet a few times and then at nursery that afternoon did a wee and a poo on their toilet!!!!!! However it's now Saturday and he wants his nappy back on at all
Times and now won't sit on the toilet again! He had a huge fuss made of him and we have him a car we had promised should he sit on the toilet trying to be patient and not pressuring him at all but don't understand now he's done it why the momentum has stopped!!!!

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Gotosleep123 · 16/01/2016 21:22

I second bribery. Dd was 'potty' trained but had serious meltdowns at the the mention of a big toilet. Not good as nursery only have toilets and dragging a potty everywhere a total pain. I brought a peppa pig dragon dinosaur on the bathroom window ledge and said she could have it if she just sat on the toilet. It took a couple of hours of her regularly cruising past the window until she relented. She wasn't magically toilet trained straight away but it got her past her fear.

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Shoegal5 · 17/01/2016 21:46

Yes trying the bribery thing and seemed to work at first as promised him a " lightening McQueen car" he knows we have the set and he can have one when he goes so now he has the first one he doesn't seem as interested! Put another on window ledge in kitchen as an incentive! He's back to playgroup this week where he did it before as x3 others being potty trained so will keep you posted!

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Gotosleep123 · 17/01/2016 22:12

I'll keep my fingers crossed! Good luck!

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Shoegal5 · 18/01/2016 19:20

Thank you back at it tomorrow ....

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Shoegal5 · 19/01/2016 21:04

Ok so went to playgroup straight from childminder without his nappy on today and told that they don't wear nappies at "school " anymore ( even though it's not school yet officially) he was fine with that and sat on the toilet x4 and was even laughing and singing and just said no wee wee! Was dry for almost 4 hours and they said he has no issues there and good as gold! On the way home he wet himself ( which I was expecting for holding it for so long) then did another wee and poo when he got home in his pants in the lounge. I was very cool about it and said don't worry and we'll try and get to the toilet next time! He would not sit on the toilet here and I did not push it! So a step forward that he seems happy at playgroup but why won't he do it at home?

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Shoegal5 · 20/01/2016 17:33

Did wee on toilet at playgroup again today has accepted the fact he does not wear nappies there anymore & good as gold! Will he go anywhere near the toilet here?....no!!!!! Hoping he will get into such a routine there he'll start going at home too! Can't really complain massive progress and dry for long periods 2 hours since being home today then desperately did one in the bath so doesn't want to be wet either

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Shoegal5 · 01/02/2016 21:58

Ok so my lo turned 3 last weds and we built up to the fact that he can no longer have nappies when he's 3 and miraculously 5 days later I can happily say that we have gone x3 full days with no accidents and happy to sit on the toilet here , there and everywhere! Suddenly all just clicked last Friday and hasn't looked back!!!!! Happy ending all round